hitenmitsurugiryuu

bunch of random stuff

2012-01-24T06:53:00.000-08:00

i look fat in recent pictures...time to lose the flab.

i'm pretty bummed out because intro to advertising has group work. i thought it would be group-work free because the course consists of only 3hr weekly lectures.

my amp (or my cable) is not working.

dede suryana is pretty damn cute.

there's astronomy tomorrow. i am such a geek.

the reposts on 9gag are annoying.

i need a schedule book for 2012.

i need money.

my dream is to migrate to some coastal indonesian place and get married to some hot enterpreneur who surfs.

last night, i killed my first ever adult cockroach. with my mom's weapon of destruction: the broom. i left it lying on its back in its death throes. or so i thought. the next morning my mom picked its seemingly dead body and threw itinto the bin only to have it scuttle back out. but she killed it, again.

yeah.

Rollercoaster

2012-01-23T05:10:00.000-08:00

The beginning of the year was so horrible for me. Stressed over school and friends. Went through a rollercoaster ride of emotions long enough to last a year. In a few weeks. I'm so glad both issues have been sorted out. I'm quite proud of myself.

About school:

This is going to sound pathetic, but yes. I was stressing about my modules. The module that I wanted badly, astronomy, was oversubscribed to the point that it was ridiculous. Since my first semester it had always clashed with something else. Everything about this module was beautiful. The content. The exam format. The lecture theater. And this time it clashed with nothing. And maybe it could pull my gpa up cos my core modules are...HAHAHAHAH. So i HAD to secure this module this semester. So i camped. Hunched over the laptop, left index finger on the left click button, right ring finger on 'enter'. Click load. Dialog box with "load plan 1?" Ring finger presses enter for ok. Repeat. Load. Ok. Load. Ok. Load. Ok. Load. Ok. 1 vacancy. Minds goes into overdrive, heart beats as twice the normal rate. Click 'add to stars'. Option for add as prescribed or unrestricted appears. Mind goes blank for a split second. But that split second in the universe of course registration in ntu equals to ten years. Click on unrestricted. The page goes white, and appears again, with the dreaded red text 'no vaancy bla bla bla'. Mind bursts into fire, urge to smash fist/face into keyboard is too overwhelming. Cool down. Lather, rinse, repeat.

This stealing of vacancy happened for a few times a day. However, i had already sent in an appeal. But i didn't have my hopes up, so i camped. On the 2nd day of camping (i didn't have any classes), i camped the whole duration stars was open. A few times i smashed my fist into the keyboard. Stopped camping for meals. The next day I had class, but stayed home to camp. At 10.30, i saw a vacancy, an clicked add to stars. But it said 'no course was selected'. I was furious. What the hell do you mean by no course selected. I fucking selected astronomy. Then i checked my registered courses. And lo and behold, astronomy was there. I burst into tears. Hahaha. I checked my email. And there it was, nestled in my inbox. "your appeal has been successful". I couldn't believe it. Haha.

And yesterday, i decided to forgo my plan of retaking business finance. All this while i thought all business modules had tutorials (which i disliked, cos lecture + tutorial is too much effort for me, who will be s/u-ing the business module) but last week i was casually window shopping for business modules and saw a couple of modules that were just 3-hr lectures! And yesterday, even with a splitting, nauseating headache, i camped for it, and secured a vacancy for intro to advertising! And one for my friend too! So proud of myself. Hehe. In the process, i dropped vietnamese. The 2 lessons i attended were sooooo foreign to me. I came in without knowing a single thing about vietnam. Not even how they say hello, or yes or no, or where exactly it is on the map. Except that the national dish is pho and spring rolls are from there. Haha. It is a tonal language (which is frightening for me); six tones in all. And 12 vowels.

So, my final semester studying in school would see me taking 6 modules, unless i take a special semester, which would leave me with 5 modules. Maybe i'll take thai. Then i could blend in in thailand. Hah.

So yeah, yet another entry about school.

2012-01-15T07:23:00.000-08:00

mentally and physically exhausting day.

first was tuition. 1st session. things went smoothly.

then it was off to jb for the usual restocking of inventory. and good food.

and then it was home for a while then...

labrador park! i've been there loads of times but this time we walked around the newly opened boardwalk! beautiful. when you walk past the condos by the marina, it really doesn't look or feel like singapore. it felt like some coastal mediterranean town. gorgeous. for your information, the 3 'canals' in the estate used to be dry docks where ships were maintained! my dad used to work there...as a commercial diver. diving in those 'canals' and making sure the ships were aligned properly, maintaining the gates, etc. i find it really cool! it was so nostalgic for him.

we walked quite a distance...the ending point was this beautiful boardwalk overlooking really clean and blue part of the sea. there were bushes of flowers by the pavement, and overlooking all this was the gorgeous burj-inspired condominium. this whole area is now one of my favourite places in singapore. and then it was the long way back to the car. hehe.

then it was a stopover at ayer rajah for more good food and then home, where i tried to clear things up. hopefully there are no more bad feelings between us.

i shall sleep now. legs feel tired, in a good way.

2012-01-09T06:01:00.000-08:00

why am i so useless? unwanted, ignored, left out by my friends. what's wrong with me? :'(

The day before

2012-01-07T22:00:00.000-08:00

Hi blog. So it's me again, and I'm gonna rant about guess what...school.

Tomorrow's the first day of school of Year 3 Sem 2. Am I looking forward to it? Not really. I'll whine on the first few days...then I'll get used to it like every start of a new school semester. Back to the lab again, but I'm comforted by the fact that this would be my last lab module. I know I'll probably have be stuck in a lab during internship...but for now, I'm just happy that this would be the last time I'm graded for a lab module which only ever pulled my gpa down.

Then it would be back to learning Japanese again too. Looking forward to that. Then, before you know it, it'll be the summer vacation again. Like the previous semesters. Especially the last one, which passed by in a whirlwind.

I'm gonna pool my hard-earned money this time for a vacation. In June. I wanna go on two vacations in the summer holidays. One with my friends with my hard-earned money, and another all-expenses paid one with my family. Maybe i'll chip in for accomodation costs. Hehe. See, there i go again, babbling about the summer vacation when the semester hasn't even stared. With my money I'm gonna send my cat for a proper sterilization. This previous one was botched and although she can't get pregnant, she still goes in heat from time to time. Then maybe, i'll get a good camera. And then maybe, maybe, maybe....argh so many things to do and buy with so little money! Such is life...

So tomorrow's the big day...start of school, and for my ex-students! They'll be receiving their O level results. It hasnt't hit me yet but I'm gonna be soooo nervous for them tomorrow!

2012

2012-01-01T19:12:00.000-08:00

so it's 2012 already huh...

the year i turn 22! i know i'd just turned 21 but still...22 sounds old to me.

this may sound pathetic to you, but i've been counting the years since 2009. like when it was 2010, i was like "it's been 1 year since 2009" and when it was 2011, "it's been 2 years since 2009." this year, it'll be 3 years since the best year of my life (so far). why? because i did a lot of new things. the first time i went on a flight, and visited the beautiful island of bali (speaking of which, i have something to say about bali, but i'll explain later), picked up this wonderful thing called scubadiving, started university, went on adults-free trip to kl...the list goes on.

i hope this year would trump 2009. i plan to take up advanced open water certification, then maybe go on a trip to sipadan. hopefully. 2012 would be the year i enter my final year of university too. that was fast. seriously. my four years in secondary school crawled by agonizingly in comparison to this. university was so full of ups and downs, and of course the 3 month vacations made the semesters short too. and honestly, although i was sad to say goodbye to 2011 because it meant saying goodbye to being forever 21, 2011 was pretty uneventful for me. unlike some of my friends who had a blast going on exchange, seeing the world, all i got was a short trip to kl. but i'm thankful for 2011 because it was the best academic year for me (so far). no complaining about that.

so...about bali...

i was waiting for my mum to pick me up from the toa payoh hdb hub when i heard this minahrep talking to her friends...

"anywhere...phuket la, ko phi phi la, krabi la..anywhere but bali! i don't get why people like that place so much."

i have so much to say about this. yeah, you have to admit, the places that most tourists go, like kuta beach are really crowded and have 'tourist trap' written all over. and compared to phuket, the water at kuta beach (the only water that most tourists see) is nowehere near as spectacular and blue and clear as phuket, phi phi etc. but as someone who dives, i know that bali is an amazing place for diving. but the sites are nowhere near the tourist centre which is in southern bali. to get to the sites, you have to set aside a day just to get there. so, non-divers, don't usually see these amazing places.

just google 'tulamben', 'nusa penida', and 'menjangan' to see what bali's about. kuta beach has rough waves and is more suitable for surfing. so people who come to bali thinking it's a snorkeler's paradise get really disappointed when they snorkel at the horrible nusa dua (in the south). that place is chaotic, more suitable for sea sports like jetskiing, parasailing etc. for snorkelling/diving? NO. the coral's dead, the visibility is poor. ~~but the divemasters are cute.~~ so yes, i'm definitely visiting bali again, but i'm not gonna spend much time in kuta. god willing, i'll visit tulamben!

yeah i might have sounded macam paham there...but that's just my two cents.

2011-12-09T22:57:00.000-08:00

I was planning my timetable for the next semester...and I realized that I have no motivation for school. My core subjects don't interest me the least bit. And the lab module is going to be gruelling. God knows how much I detest being in the lab. The mad rush of getting chemicals, rushing for the rotavap, worrying that you did something wrong, don't get much product, working through the wee hours on the lab report, feeling extremely dumb during the paper...all for 2 AUs. Organic lab is gonna be a doozie, so I decided to take it easy with 6 modules this coming semester.

Which would leave me with 12 AUs of major prescribed eleectives in year 4 sem 1 and 2 unrestricted UEs. At least this would be the last lab module for me. I sure ain't gonna do summer research or final year project. I'm not gonna have a career in a lab.

The thing that will keep me going till I graduate is just the degree. I wonder who else has the same sentiments as me. My coursemates seem so motivated, so well adapted to the lab, feeling excited for the fyp...not me. I'm in the wrong course, but the thought that I don't have to be in the chemistry field after I garduate comforts me a bit. It won't be easy, but I'd rather sit in an office 9 - 5 than work in a lab.

2011-12-02T22:40:00.000-08:00

Hi blog.

So what's been happening?

Not a lot of good stuff. Exams have ended but...

Let's start with the exams. Firstly, 311. I spent sooo much time studying for it. I did the problems in the lecture notes many times over. I made sure i understood every bit of it, that my understanding of the concept was solid. I felt prepared for the paper. I did pretty well for the midterm, so i guess i felt pretty prepared. Then about a week before the paper, i attempted the 'practice problems for final exam'. It totally threw me off. I did the paper at least 4 times over, yet i couldn't solve most of it without referiring to the answers. I consoled myself by thinking that he gave us really difficult questions so that the final would be a breeze for us.

I couldn't have been more wrong. The final paper was a total disaster. In the practice paper, the questions were set roughly like this: given 3-4 spectroscopic data, deduce the structure of a compound. That itself was pretty hard.

The final exam was like this: given 10 spectroscopic data, deduce the structure of 5 compounds. Which means we have only 2 spectroscopic data to work with for each compound. And some of the data was unreliable. (you don't know if the number in the MS data corresponded to the compound, or its fragment. Whereas in the practice paper, they would tell you. fucking annoying, and very evil).

So i pretty much have no confidence of passing that paper. i'm really upset because unlike those papers where you don't really study for it and you get a low grade, i invested so much time for this. If i had known the paper was going to be that insane, i would have put in more time and effort for 314 instead.

A few days before my last paper, i woke up at about 6am to an unpleasant smell. It wasn't stromg, but it was there. I knew that my cat had urinated in the house again. I looked for the source of the smell, thinking that it was under the dining table or near the fam (where she had previously peed). But it was right beside my mattress(I sleep in the living room nowadays, because my room is really stuffy). And guess what, my beloved blackberry was right in the middle of the puddle of piss. The damage was done. I have 4 months to go till i can change my phone, so now i'm using my old phone.

And i fell sick the day after the last paper. I was sick on my 21st birthday too. I was upset, really, but i felt grateful that i didn't fall sick during the exam period. I was seriously in no condition to study. So now, i'm typing this entry on the ipad. Pardon any typos cos i'm not used to it.

stuff that has been going on

2011-11-08T08:28:00.000-08:00

hi blog. what's been going on? lots of stuff.

1. school
2. new crush (it's been a while since my last crush...)
3. school
4. university
5. exams
6. lessons

yeah boring stuff.

and yesterday i got meself a.......*drumroll*

fender telecaster.

when i read through my blog posts, i realized that i wanted a strat. and i did. really badly. but then i got influenced by eross candra and his 234984024 telecasters and changed my mind. and then i tried it at the shop...and fell in love. the glossy fingerboard finish. the crunchy tone on distortion. and a fender is a fender. now that's one item checked off my "MUST HAVE IN MY LIFETIME" list. from now onwards, all my earnings can be channelled to my getaway funds etc, and i don't have to be so tightfisted anymore.

i have a japanese oral test tomorrow. i should sleep now.

goodnight

random(?) memory

2011-09-20T08:44:00.000-07:00

the other day i was sitting on the toilet when a memory from 8(!) years ago randomly popped up in my head.

it was the december holidays before secondary school started. my mom had signed me up for a seminar for life skills for teenagers. it was a 2-day thing. of course i reluctantly went. she had said that she wanted to prepare me for transition into adulthood or something like that.

i remember the day she dropped me off at the location. can't remember where it was though. i think it was some country club. she registered my name and left. i knew absolutely no one. ok so i spotted a familiar face so i wasn't completely alone. but almost everyone had friends with them. so in that sea of people i just stood there with my mouth shut.

during the seminar itself there were team activities too. it was painful at best. i was the only girl in the group. the guys were so awkward and shy. i was just miserable but i went along with the activities.

end of day 1. parents picked me up. they asked me how it was and i just said, "it was ok." no it wasn't. my social skills were (are?) nonexistent and i had just spent ~10 hours of painful activities and barely spoke. during the ride home i guess my mom could tell that i had a bad day and didn't enjoy myself. she asked me whether i wanted to come for the 2nd day. i answered hesitantly. "no." i knew that i was letting my mom down. she had paid a lot for me to attend that course yet didn't even want to complete it.

when i thought about that memory again i realized that my mom truly invested a lot in me so that i could excel in life. but she was and is sensitive to my feelings (which i don't always voice out) and always makes sure i was ok. i feel sad thinking about my past self. i wish i could go back 8 to years ago and give me a slap in the face and lecture myself about how much my mom had sacrificed for me to attend that seminar. but i had just turned 12. just a kid.

so yeah. a memory.

king's cross

2011-07-24T12:40:00.001-07:00

it's monday 3.40 am. i have a slight cold and some phlegm. it's probably gonna get worse. and there's a movie marathon at a friend's place tomorrow. i mean later. well...i just wanna declare that i've already watched hp 7 part 2. as a whole it wasn't that awesome...maybe my expectations were too high.

i was a bit nitpicky about the details they left out. i thought they could have made the movie a bit longer to satisfy the diehards. i didn't like the scene where ron and hermione kissed. it was so random and it was shot at such an unflattering angle.

but the scene where the ghosts were resurrected before harry was about to present himself on a silver platter to voldy...it was too much for me. i remember crying while reading that scene in the book. on screen...it was just as good. especially when it came to lily evans...

and then snape...when he hugged lily. almost cried.

i thought the king's cross scene was brilliant. literally. no seriously it matched the scene in my head. and the room of requirement fire was whooooooaaaaa pretty amazing.

and when the movie ended...it hit me that there will be no more harry potter after this. no books or movies. i grew up with the series since i was 10...now i'm turning 21. i'm really sad to see it go. at least i can relive it myself through the books...

yeah whatever

2011-07-13T05:23:00.000-07:00

hi.

holidays are coming to a close. i think school reopens in 2 to 3 weeks time or whatever. not looking forward to it. plus i'll be swamped with 5 tuition assignments. and this will be the first time i'll be taking 7 modules. oh good luck to me. at least i'm making money. sometimes i feel that giving tuition is more worthwhile than going to school sitting through some lecture you barely give a flying fuck about. one of the modules has a 3 hour tutorial or shit which ends at 9pm. whoever planned that slot...congratulations, you've been crowned no-life-ass-hole of the year!

so i've been trying to earn money not for savings or anything like that. i want money to get myself a fender strat and a few effects pedals. hah. and to finance my getaways. and to pay the bills as usual of course...and to lighten my parents load.

hmmm...so i met up with a few sec sch friends a couple of days ago. although we have all matured in some way or another (except for me) we are still the same. everyone's all grown up but we all still retain our quirks...and they shared some of the stuff they went through in uni. i know it's bad to say this but i feel better knowing i'm not the only one suffering in school. hey misery loves company. i can't remember if i shared my troubles with them. i know i left out my lab report-woes. actually in the beginning me and ctw walked around everywhere for 2.5 hours (we even picked up some groceries and ventured some old weird mall with a floor dedicated to golf) waiting for the other 2. then we met at popeye's and then some coffee at coffee bean. it was a good day but my legs were killing me.

this august i'll be entering my third year. it's the same feeling i got when i was about to start sec 3. this i'm-almost-there-i-never-thought-i-could-make-it-in-year-1 feeling. please be nice to me, year 3 and 4. i just wanna get my degree and get out of here. like how "i just wanna get my O lvl/A lvl and get out of here" when i was in sec sch and jc.

goals for the near future

2011-06-02T09:46:00.000-07:00

some goals (aside from academic-related ones - those are obvious and perpetually there) I want to achieve within these 2 years

get myself a fender stratocaster
climb mount kinabalu
get AOW certification
spend a week in tokyo
exercise regularly and maintain 50 kg (best of luck to me)
be less socially awkward

oh stratty...i can already feel you in my hands and hear your nice warm tone

2011-06-02T09:29:00.000-07:00

I am not made of ice.

I shall try to be warmer.

I am not made of ice.

sadness

2011-05-22T04:41:00.000-07:00

so today i went to a funeral. my good friend's dad passed away. she doesn't have any parents now...my heart goes out to her. she's a strong person but i can see the burden she's carrying. it's way too much for 21 year old. this friend is one i really cherish. she is one of the most genuine people i have ever met, and i can never recall having any big fights with her since we got to know each other when we were 13.

and in 8 years, this circle of friends of mine have gone to 3 funerals. one in 2004, when our friend passed away from a blood infection, another in 2006 when another friend's dad passed away and now this one.

now this friend has to take her little sister under her wing and lead her through life. while having to complete her studies. and maybe even settle some legal matters. she is really skinny now. but she has 2 and a half more years before she becomes a vet, so that's good.

during the funeral when we sat and talked we joked about things although i was a bit hesitant at first in the fear of disrespecting her family. but she talked about everyday stuff and then i relaxed and we tried to lighten things up. we remisnisced and discussed future plans to meet up. laughing. but whenever we asked about how her dad passed away i could see her expression falter and eyes water(of course). she is putting up a strong front. she said herself because she had some company around that she was numb to her feelings. but it would hit later when she was alone. but i know she has to stay storng because she is the elder sister and needs the strength to go through life.

please God, give her and her sister the strength to go through life and succeed. please let them have happy and fulfilling lives, free from sadness. and also, let her parents' souls rest in peace. Amin.

2011-05-13T12:17:00.000-07:00

My mom got me pyjamas! My first pair since I was...9? So comfy and cute! Polkadots on black!

Just some random trivial stuff.

I want to keep long hair. When it's a few inches past my chest, I will have reached my goal. And I'm gonna try not rebonding it this time. Before I first rebonded my hair, (I was friggin 14 years old) it was pretty straight. But after I rebonded it, everytime it grrew out it was curly. But when I was young, it was curly. So I am confused and unsure of the natural texture of my hair. It is now thick and wavy and idiotically curly in some places but I think they'll grow out (in time).

And tomorrow I'm getting a haircut (so much for keeping long hair). OK more of a trim. I want the length to be unchanged, only smaller in volume. It's way too thick now.

Good night!

2011-05-12T08:37:00.000-07:00

The big papers are over! Now I'm left with 216 but I'm gonna act like it doesn't exist until the day before it hehe. Feeling random so I'll just list out the things I like

cats/marine life/guitars/girl bands/japanese culture/muse/scubadiving/fender stratocasters/SCANDAL/tokyo/macbooks/chuck taylors/bright nail polish/tights/dr. martens/stripes/theme parks/beaches/marshall stacks/school of rock/the smell of air-conditioning/dimples/high gpa/money/travel

...yeah

2011-05-09T11:35:00.000-07:00

Sakki wa nihongo no shiken deshita.

Directly translated as "just now was the Japanese exam." 2 days to prepare for the 2 big ones. Wish me luck.

A few hours ago I was as tired as hell but after that cup of coffee I'm wide awake. But I don't have the mood to study. Hence this entry.

What's been happening. Exams. Got a new tutee. First lesson this Saturday. Hope everything goes well. Gonna save up for a fender strat. I love my ibanez but the strat's my dream guitar.

Also, about a week or two ago, my dad swallowed this HUGE fishbone. Why do men eat like they're in a race? Sheesh. My mom told him to push the bone down by swallowing food. My dad didn't sleep well that night. The next day he went to the doctor who referred him to a specialist and got the bone extracted. Fucking huge. And it was cross-shaped which was why it was stuck in his oesophagus. Could have caused some serious damage (death!!!) if it was left there. Thank God he's okay.

Anyway, the past weekend was the GE. Extremely exciting. I didn't know I could be so passionate about my country. But I was born and bred here. We deserve to be treated right in our own country.

Oh yeah, about a week ago I saw my very first shooting star. It was amazing. I didn't expect to see it in Singapore, with all that light pollution. I was so lucky to had been looking at the sky at the right moment.

じゃまた!

2011-05-03T03:53:00.001-07:00

calm before the typhoon

this saturday's the first paper. i think i'm almost done with revision for that. cos i did most of it more the mid-terms. so i'm thankful for mid-terms.

now today was just a gloomy day. like a continuation of yesterday. yesterday i ate at f.i.s.h. with my mom and relatives. supposed to be carousel but i guess it was too expensive (cousin was treating). so me and my cousins were discussing about our june/july trip. i realized that with my budget we couldn't do much in sabah so i was prety sure it wasn't gonna be worth my money. i was hoping my parents would lend me some...i didn't ask but i doubt that they were gonna.

so the thought of not going on an annual trip this year really made me depressed. especially since i just had the worst semester ever. i just wasn't into school. lab just made it worse. i just need to get away from this country. yeah so i was looking forward to a big trip especially with the government's angbao coming in...but it still isn't enough. and it's not like i'm not working. my pay isn't very big and i have to pay my bills and contacts and top-up my ez-link so i'm not left with a lot.

then i thought about those lucky people who can afford to do european trips and how much money they spend and when i tell my mom all of this she snaps at me "don't think about other people." it really pisses me off that she seems to be happy not seeing the world and she doesn't seem to be working hard enough so that the family can enjoy overseas trips.

i know i'm gonna regret saying this but when i start working and can afford to go on those big trips, i don't think i'll be bringing her along. she did say to me "you can do all that when you earn your own money" instead of "don't worry i'll work hard so we can do all that." i love my mom but sometimes her stinginess and narrowmindedness really blinds her.

then today sheeba came back from mating after about 4 days. of course she was dirty. the last time we gave her a bath she drew blood so i'm sure i wasn't gonna do it again. sheeba's different. i think it's because she's been a stray for so long that she's not used to being handled. sometimes i feel scared when i pet her because she's really unpredictable. also, we think she has a kidney problem because her eyes discahrge this red liquid (blood?). so my mom suggested we don't let her in anymore cos she may bring diseases back to our house. which is true. i was heartbroken of course but when i weighed all the factors, i knew that the best solution was to let her go.

the next time she leaves the house, she won't be let in. let's see how we endure her pitiful meowing outside the house. we'll probably get another cat because our family loves having a cat around. initially i objected to this idea of letting sheeba go because the reason we took her in was not because "we want a cat so we'll take sheeba in" but "sheeba looks so pitiful and hungry, we should take care of her". so now letting her go and getting a new one seems wrong. but i guess this is in the best interests of our family because she is quite aggressive and probably sick. i'm not sure how committed we are to this idea of letting her go. we'll probably give in and let her in. i don't know.

interesting

2011-04-29T07:16:00.000-07:00

tried playing avril lavigne's "i'm with you" from the chords and i just couldn't get the strumming right...until i realized it was in 3/4 time! as in 1,2,3,1,2,3 and not 1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4. interesting! should give her more credit. i always thought songs in 3/4 time were more suited for folk and classical music but i guessed wrong.

i've been watching her live performances and she can really sing live while playing the guitar. although her credibility's been slightly ruined adfter 'girlfriend', i think she's still great :)

also, sheeba came back today after a longer than usual stroll downstairs with a few injuries. so far just some wounds probably from a male/rival cat. thank god no bone injuries. i'm pretty sure she'll recover on her own. at least she's using her cat bed now :)

oh yeah. i went out with A today and we're considering sabah for our holiday trip. only if we get another person to join us. just the 2 of us would be scary. with an overseas trip, a few birthday presents, a shopping trip and maybe 2 trips to USS i'm probably gonna be broke pretty fast although the government's money just got in the bank. oh well. money is for circulation.

puke

2011-04-28T11:41:00.000-07:00

Oh hello again.

I think this is gonna be a long, colourful entry. Lots of stuff to talk about.

So what's been going on? Well today was the last 'lesson' for the semester. Actually I went to school for a Japanese oral test which lasted less than 5 minutes. It was OK. Sensei made it very casual so I was relaxed. Even laughed during some parts. I hope she teaches me again for level 3.

About her: She's energetic and extremely funny. And she's been living in sg for about 20 years so she uses singlish sometimes. Terms like 'paiseh', 'alamak', even 'goyang-goyang'. I'm pretty sure she understands Malay because when she asked me to say a sentence in Malay for this Malaysian Chinese girl to translate into Japanese sensei translated it into English when the girl was thinking. Cool huh.

So after the test I went to Toa Payoh Library to study cos my mom was at the hdb hub for some seminar. In the library I studied diligently at the study table like a good student. Then this guy sits down opposite me carrying a stack of books. He didn't put them down gently. He slammed them down. OK I thought it was probably by accident. So I continued studying. But I couldn't help but look up from my readings everytime he slammed a book down after flipping through it. what the fuck was his problem. And he would laugh to himself too. Siao. Plus I noticed he had those gross extra long nails on his pinky fingers. Then he left for the toilet. When he came back he kicked the table. OK, seriously what the fuck is your fucking problem.

Then I met my mom at fork n spoon. Ate the best nasi ayam penyet you'll ever eat. Ojolali. Worth the money. Really. So I'm done eating and me and my mom were talking. Then this feminine looking Chinese person came in the food court. Androgynous look. Looked at body parts that would give the person's sex away. Adam's apple. Check. Lack of boobs. Check. "Is that a man or woman?" my mom asked. A man. Albeit a feminine one. So we continued talking after being momentarily distracted by the dude. Then suddenly we heard a guy shouting angrily in front of the ojolali stall. It was mr. andro. It was surprising that a feminine looking man could be so loud and scary. He was shouting at the cashier. I couldn't tell what the hooha was about. But even if the cashier was rude to him (which was probably the case), I couldn't see why he would get so worked up. He scolded her for quite a few minutes, while everyone looked on. The cashier was so relaxed. Chill only. MAybe the guy was crazy. So siao.

Then I was unfortunate enough to witness some major PDA near my house. It was midnight and me and my mom were about to drive out ffrom the carpark when we saw those two. They were so into it that they actually collapsed on the ground in a heap of passion. Me and my mom couldn't look away. It was like watching a trainwreck. Horrible, but you continue watching anyway. Gross.

OK so next week's the exams. I don't exactly feel excited. It's more of...oh. Exams. OK. Let's get this over with. I'm more excited for the 3 month holiday though. Although there won't be any family overseas vacation this time (which I'm pretty down about). Hopefully a trip nearby with A. Anywhere. I just wanna get away from sg for a while. This country's suffocating me. Maybe I won't work this time. Just take another tuition student maybe? I don't know what's up with this lack of enthusiasm in me. I think it's because there's no big annual family vacation this time. Was looking forward to yet another beach holiday. Oh well.

A few nights ago I actually wrote a song. It's lyric-less for now. I can't seem to write lyrics. When I try it's always some angry lyrics about friends who don't appreciate friends and materialistic people and stupid boys who think they're all that. You know, angsty stuff. Doesn't match the melody I wrote (which is surprisingly pop-rock and cheerful. I was heading for a heavier rock direction. Oh well). Hmmm. Wouldn't it be nice to play in a band? Electric guitars and stuff. Not really into that soothing acoustic stuff. Pleasant, but a little to sleepy for me.

Also, you know what I hate? Materialistic people. People who ask for too much from others. When they can afford it themselves. People who seem to befriend someone cos he/she is rich. Gross. And people with dicks for brains. People who say one thing but do another behind people's backs. OK too much bad energy here. Gonna sign off here. It's already 3 and I'm supposed to go to JB this morning. Maybe I'll disregard sleep for tonight (and be a zombie tomorrow).

2011-04-15T02:23:00.000-07:00

hello again. it seems that whenever something bad happens i pour it out in here.

so what happened. i'm not gonna type out names here. just in case they do some search to see if anyone has badmouthed anyone.

ok so i made a mistake of taking a group member's graph for my lab report. so i had to redo the report. ok. i realized my mistake, i regret it, and won't do it again. point taken. then the marked redone lab report came with a D on it. during the 'investigation' when we asked how much they'll subtract from our grade they said each graph was worth 10% of the grade to we assumed they'll subtract 20% and a little bit more as punishment (in addition to redoing the lab report). so we thought the worst grade we could get was a C. but nooooo we got a D.

then we asked the TA who marked it and she said that when we left the 'investigation/meeting' the prof told the TA to deduct more marks as punishment. and the TA said that by right we should have received an F. which we almost did. on our reports the F grade was circled initially but was then covered up with blanco. so where's the transparency here. you said one thing and did another. and we redid the fucking thing for what right? isn't the punishment in redoing the lab report? and it's not like we copied answers. we did everything ourselves. we assumed that if we plotted it ourselves, we would get the same graph, so just use his. no difference what. give us until D for what right.

i feel like they're throwing their weight around and doing things just because they can...

whatever. ppl around me say that i should treat this as a lesson and forget about it. ok. i realize that using someone's graph which was plotted from a set of values identical to the rest of us is a really huge crime in this institute. it's probably worse than stealing! oh my god...i'm such a bad person aren't i...oh my god...please forgive me!

it sucks that

2011-03-09T06:32:00.000-08:00

when I'm free (test over and done with, no homework due tomorrow, class at 12.30 tomorrow, and it's only 10.30 pm now), I can't play either of my guitars because one of them is at the guitar store and the other has one of its strings broken.

i really want to play now. argh.

p.s. i just realized that on the sidebar i put my age as '18'. i'm 20 going on 21 now. it just hit me how fast time flies and how long i've had this blog. i feel sad, actually. that time has a habit of just whizzing past.

speaking of which i really miss 2009. that was a really good year for me. i entered uni. made new friends (some of which, regrettably drifted away from me in the horrible year of 2010), went to bali, got my scuba license, did pretty well in school, etc. 2009 please repeat yourself this year.

string snap

2011-03-08T07:31:00.000-08:00

Hello old friend.

Why did I decide to type in you today?

A few bad things happened today.

First thing was when I came back from school and tried to pick Shiba up, she went berserk while she was in my arms and scratched me. It was like a tornado of claws. So now I have two puncture wounds and a few other gashes. The puncture wounds bled like crazy. But this happened to me before after Shiba's bath. Prior to Shiba I had never had a cat before so I'm surprised I didn't freak out.

The second bad thing: So a few minutes ago I was playing my acoustic guitar. I tuned the high E string just nice but I guess the string couldn't take the tension for some reason and snapped. The strings are only a year old. But I remember stretching the strings. Oh well. I changed the strings January last year and it was torture. At that point of time the strings + guitar were 2 and a half years old and the strings were pretty rusty. To be honest I changed them not because they were rusty, but because the G-string (haha, seriously) snapped. And it snapped while it was in its case. I was horrified when I pulled my guitar out of the case.

At least I know how to change the strings now (I hope I still remember). So this Sunday I guess I'll buy a set of new strings along with picking up my electric guitar from servicing (actually it's set-up tuning, which I never did when I first got it in October last year haha). My guitar had tuning problems because I didn't send it for set-up tuning (salesguy never told me...major minus points to him. Luckily he wasn't working there anymore otherwise I would have...given him a piece of my mind. What was he thinking letting a first-time e. guitar buyer get a floyd rose locking tremolo guitar? Never mind. I'll treat this as experience, and I love my guitar anyway).

For those who are unclear what the problem is: usually you tune guitars using the tuning pegs at the guitar's head. But mine is a floyd rose a.k.a. you tune using finetuners, small screws at the bridge of the guitar, instead of the tuning pegs. But the finetuners are as their name says 'fine', so they are only for minor adjustments. I didn't know this. I thought they couuld be used exclusively. But then they got too tight to further tighten them to make the string sound sharper. So even at its tightest the string wasn't in tune (flat).

To seriously tune it the locking thingy near the head has to be unscrewed and removed bla bla bla. This was supposed to be done when I first got it. But at that point of time I didn't know and it sounded ok. When I read the instructions on how to tune it I got intimidated. But next time it gets severely out of tune I'll do all this myself. Haha guitar tech in training.

So that's why I was playing the old acoustic guitar. Because the one I play every night is away in JB :( I hope it's okay. Or maybe is it time to get a new acoustic? How to I persuade my parents to get a new one though...

Nah I'll just get new strings...I'll need to get a tweezer thing that can pull out those balls that hold the strings down on the guitar though...I used a friend's hair clip thingy but I can't find it now...

P.S. Tomorrow is my Language Puzzle quiz. "Quiz" it may be but it means "important test that contributes to your grades" to me.

2010-10-01T18:45:00.000-07:00

these days it's just schoolwork and tuition and whatever. i feel like i have no time for myself. this is not like me, rushing here and there, then rushing home to complete my homework. and then revision is another matter. university has changed me. the slacker who refused to commit is now fading away. in its place a responsible, more hardworking me is forming. well it's about time. i always feel sour about spending my weekends outside without family. but i have to do this. i tell myself not all my weeks will be packed like sardines. i'm just waiting for the recess week where i can catch my breath...and then plough on even harder.

on to more specific matters...next week i have a business finance presentation (i don't even have the foggiest idea of what the fuck is going on in biz finance), and a lab experiment that looks gruelling. all during my period. plus i have yet to study for my med chem paper which is the week after next. and of course the usual lab reports, tutorials, quizzes, etc. god give me strength. and, after this week, i won't have any income. that electric guitar is slipping frther and further away :'(

a fork in the road and i chose the wrong route?

2010-09-15T19:33:00.000-07:00

i feel like i don't wanna go on anymore. 6 hrs of lab every week, are you kidding me? i made the wrong choice. i don't even like chemistry. i should have listened to myself and done biological sciences instead. then there's business finance. the weekly 2 hr lectures, presentations, the need of a financial calculator really make the effort for 3 AUs (an elective too, not even a core module) really taxing.

back to my major, chemistry. i am really starting to doubt if i want a career (most of my adult life) spent in the lab, dealing with dangerous chemicals and all that. i guess the only alternative is teaching. so maybe that's it. so for the next 3 yeras i'll just have to suck it up and deal with it. maybe i'll even get used to labwork. no. i may get used to it but i still don't want a lab life. teaching isn't so bad either. i know teachers complain about the administrative work they have to do and all that other stuff besides teaching, but i still think it trumps labwork anytime. plus my teacher relatives are leading very comfortable lives.

ok then, best wishes to myself.

2010-08-29T07:36:00.001-07:00

with school tomorrow, the thing that i should have thought about properly a long time ago before i got into this mess, the thing that i swept under the covers while i bulldozed my way through school, is eating me inside.

it was a mistake. why do i make such stupid, rash decisions? but then again, back then, i didn't really know what i want to do in the future (which is right around the corner), so...(acutally, i still don't know what i WANT, but the jobs that are gonna be there are probably going to be hard to get, and not what i want).

i'm not exactly sure but the career prospects do not appeal to me one bit. i wish i had a time machine. no use crying over spilt milk but it feels nice. but then i think again, i'm horrible in the arts so sociology etc would've been a no-go, and i wasn't educated properly in physics, so engineering's out. i wish i had a good physics teacher back in sec 2 and took 'O' Level physics.

2010-04-29T21:30:00.000-07:00

pulled out of movie date with the girls because i feel like shit. the time of the month is giving me hell as always. i feel so bloated. last period was so bad i almost fainted in the toilet. it was like a burst pipe. i hope i feel good enough to meet the jc friends later though...

2010-03-30T06:40:00.000-07:00

my mind hasn't been at ease lately. i'm not sure why. but i am grateful for the long weekend which is coming up. i need a night in town. i need a day to bake something. something has been bothering me recently...looming exams maybe? my mind is cluttered. it's a mirror image of the current state of my room.

p.s. i'm planning to go on the 4-7 jun advanced open water course dive trip. then my period would hopefully come a week later (calculations done by iPeriod on my iPod, I can't live without it). which would mean i should tell my dad to set our redang dive trip to ~20 jun? hmmm. need to make a decision by this weekend.

copied from other blog.

2010-03-21T07:52:00.000-07:00

(this is about some guy who tried to pick me up while i was on vacation in genting highlands. i am not implying that i think i'm hot. i was reading this blog when i came across this post, and it made me smile and feel better about myself.)

my parents + bro wanted to drive the go-karts but they looked slow so i gave it a pass. so i was on sitting on the stone seat along the track, pissed off when i realized how long the queue for the go-kart was. i was in for a long wait. it was cold, so i was wearing my shocking pink jacket. and my shoes were the same colour. and i was sitting alone. so i was asking for what was about to happen.

this group of mats were staring at me, but made no approach. phew that was a relief. but then, who i assumed the group thought was the best-looking skipped up to me and plopped down next to yours truly as though he was a good friend of mine. he was grinning at me. i assessed him. red jacket. only a few inches taller then me, quite slight. too thin! a goatee. in his 20s, maybe? most of all, most importantly, a mat. one not proficient in english. the type that sits around, teasing girls. (i have had bad experiences with this type). one of them said in malay, "go get her with your goatee!"

i was alarmed at first, though my face didn't show it. then i decided to entertain him.

guy : (plops down next to me) i see you like pink.

Actually, my favourite colour is red.

me : yeah.

guy : you came here alone?

me : no. (glares at him)

guy: with whom did you come? your boyfriend?

my family. are you seriously hitting on me? actually, what i wanted to say was "yes i came with my boyfriend. he's getting more money from our hotel room." but i didn't.

me : my grandfather.

guy : where is he?

me : on the space shot. (i point up at the terrifying ride)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

guy : so it's just the two of you?

me : yes.

guy : (inaudible over the go-karts) so, can i join you?

me : what? (leans in slightly. i think that was hhis intention)

guy : can i join you? (gets up and puts out his hand)

NOT IN A MILLION YEARS.

me : no.

guy : (sits down) why?

me : i don't feel like it.

guy : (puts out his hand) i'm man.

me : (looks at his hand, and ignores it) .....

man : what's your name?

Hidayah.

me : Fadhilah. (my friend's name)

man : where are you from?

me : kl.

man : where in kl?

me : somewhere.

man : so, fadhilah....

who? then i realized he was talking to me.

me : ...

(more silence, for a few minutes.)

man : (gets up and looks at me) catch you later.

me : yeah.

so i was left alone more about ten more minutes, glad that he gave up on me. then i resumed waiting patiently. i was appalled to see that he came back, with his posse, equipped with a fucking camera. i hate those things. man sat himself down next to me again, this time even closer.

me : what (the fuck) is this?

man : let's take pictures!

me : NO.

man : awww, come on, just a few...

WHAT THE FUCK? LEAVE ME ALONE.

me : NO. (gets up and leaves)

man & co. : aww, come on!

In retrospect that was pretty bitchy of me. I totally blew him off. But he caught me at a really bad time (I was simply in a bad mood. PMS?) and I was getting impatient...so...

2010-03-11T07:07:00.000-08:00

argh fuck this shit. i am so fucking pissed. i have a fucking bio test tomorrow and i haven't studied, and i have a shitfuck 1st draft resume (not. fucking. graded.) to hand in too. just as i typed that i have come to a decision. i shall study for the fuckwit test now, till maybe 1+ and then get up early tomorrow to check my email for some resume 'help' courtesy of ash, and then cram some more.

i'm so fucked, but the test weightage isn't that big (i think). fuck tests. we should all party till 2012, cos that's when the world will end (or so they say). if that's true, i am going to quote thay facebook group, 'i just spent my whole life in school'. that is some piece of shit. that is so true. bitter pill to swallow. so why don't we booze up get stoned get laid till 2012? great idea. well maybe not to that extent. i wanna see the world.

guitar noobdom

2010-02-20T14:35:00.000-08:00

no sleep tonight because i am so fucking happy because i changed my guitar strings which means i can play properly and it sounds so much better plus it feels much nicer and my fingers don't smell weird after playing.

it took me around 4 hours to change them because it was my first time and besides reading instructions from a book i was watching the how-to video on youtube which was 10000000x more helpful than the book. first i had to look for a bridge pin remover substitute. a tweezer-like hairclip did the trick fine albeit crudely. then some strings wouldn't go in the hole easily. then the worst part was when i was winding the strings they would pop back out after i wind them like crazy so i had to do a couple of the strings ~4 times.

now it sounds great. i hope they won't and i hope that the bridge pins stay in place. i love my guitar 13431041394x more now...didn't know strings (way cheaper than the guitar) could make such a difference.

you fucking jerk.

2010-02-14T21:59:00.001-08:00

I fucking hate you, how dare you do that, you think you're always right, get your fucking big head out of your ass and open your fucking eyes. You've crossed the line how dare you. I fucking hate you. You really hurt me.

2010-02-04T04:38:00.001-08:00

Do you know why I love Muse so much? They're an incredible band. Let me give you a good albeit crude comparison. If a band were a person. If the band sucks, its person would be slapping your face. If the band is ok, its person would give you a hug. If the band is really good, its person would be making out with you. Muse doesn't do any of this. Muse ~~fucks~~ makes love to you.

2010-02-01T20:46:00.000-08:00

I feel like fucking shit. Why did I do this to myself. I wish I could turn back time to around 2001 so all this shit never happened. It'll never go away. No guy would ever want me. He'll run away. I am the ugliest shit on the planet.

Fuck.

My favourite lyrics.

2010-01-31T21:53:00.000-08:00

Courtesy of Green Day (again).
No they're not some meaningful sap about true love or whatever.

Dickhead, fuckface, cock smoking, mother fucking, asshole,
dirty twat, waste of semen, I hope you die HEY

Platypus (I Hate You) - Green Day

Gives me this warm feeling everytime.

2010-01-14T01:40:00.000-08:00

sick...

This sucks so bad.

in my world, the line between wants and needs is blurred.

2010-01-06T00:02:00.000-08:00

Wishlist. It's gonna be a long one.

1. New guitar.
2. New make-up. Preferably MAC
3. Tix to: Green Day;
4. Superman Is Dead;
5. The Killers;
6. Paramore.
7. New wardrobe.
8. Wetsuit
9. Mask + snorkel
10. Fins
11. Books
12. iPhone
13. Trips to: Bali x infinity;
14. Maldives;
15. Stockholm;
16. Phuket + Similans;
17. Sabah (climbing Mount Kinabalu, white water rafting, diving Sipadan, etc.)
18. Macbook
19. LV/Chanel/Gucci bag

SIGHHHHHH

2009-12-30T06:12:00.000-08:00

Hello old friend.
I got my results. Apparently it's rounded up so I got a 3.7.
Parents are elated but I'm just ok with it. Because some people got way better than me and they say they expected more. Which makes me think. Do I really want this? Of course I do. But I'm not wanting it badly enough. So next sem I shall make myself want a GPA of 4 and above more badly. So badly it hurts.

At least I passed physics. I think the markers made all the chemistry students pass because after marking a few papers they realize we chemistry people have absolutely no talent in physics and that it was a stupid idea making us chemistry people take physics. And then they passed us.

my sort of t-shirts

2009-11-29T07:23:00.000-08:00

Was browsing the threadless catalogue...didn't know what all the hype was about (actually didn't know about it at all till Zach wore the average bear t-shirt). Now I know. I love them...particularly this one.

Communist Partaaaay

Wow...will get it when I have the money...

today sucked ass.

2009-11-26T05:37:00.001-08:00

Yeah today sucked. First it was the physics final, which I barely studied for. Then the text from my mom about my brother's PSLE results, which were disappointing to me. I feel extremely sad for him. How is his future going to be like, studying in a neighbourhood school? Pardon my snobbishness but that's what you get when you've spent four years in a...reputable school. I actually cried for him. He told me he cried too after he received his results.

He must have felt soooo sad, and must have been really scared to tell us his results after we pressured him s so much. Imagining how it was like in his shoes after he received his results breaks my heart :,(

I love my brother soooo much and I want the best for him. Before he received his results I told him that I would love him no matter what. But after knowing his score I'm afraid I went back on my word a little as I made some condescending remarks about normal stream students (which he we initially decided to put him through, but not anymore) and neighbourhood schools and I was going on about why he didn't put in enough effort. I felt so horrible after that. His face when I said those words...broke my heart. I could see that he felt sooo useless, and that he would never be as good as me :(

But I love him so much. I'm crying as I type this. I promise I won't make such remarks ever again and that I'll try to guide him more when he enters secondary school.

And then now my dad who's supposed to be sick is out with his friends again. He was supposed to take us out for dinner/supper but he keeps putting his stupid friends first.

T-3

2009-11-24T18:28:00.000-08:00

Math exam in about T-3.

Do you realize that a simple typo of the word 'exams' turns it into 'exmas'? I do not associate exams with the joy that is Xmas (although I do not celebrate it). Funny how the world works. It's pointing it's finger, silently mocking at you as you stumble through the jungle that is life. With knowledge as my macheti...

SPEAKING OF MACHETIS

It's really satisfying to hear the 'slsh' sound as you slash through the infected's heads. They come right off if you aim properly.

So tomorrow it's mass execution day. For physics-challenged people that is. I picture myself 'finishing' the paper within 30 minutes, and then stare into space for about an hour, thinking about life and the way it works, why I exist, and what weapon I should stick to in L4D2 later.

So after physics, it's gonna be a mini-rest period. Of course I'll study for biochemistry. Then there's an engagement ceremony to attend, my birthday, and the KAY-EL TRIP.

Beezay beezay beezay.

P.S. I got my diver c-card in the mail yesterday. Finally. It's sooooo pretty! :D
P.S.S. My parents gave me the greenlight for the PEN A tickets to the Muse gig! And Nia is coming along...:)
I finally get to see my favourite trio live...if I corner Matt I'll ask if I can dissect his brain...he's a GENIUS.

hey there.

2009-11-24T07:23:00.000-08:00

Math paper tomorrow. Wish me luck.

So...what have I been up to lately?

Well, the most worthy of mentioning is of course the purchase of...L4D2. Yep I bought it. Before the exams ended. So..how is it? Holy shit it's awesome. It's waaaaay more developed than the first installment. When I compare the 2, the first one seems like a beta. But I still love it though. L4D2 is hard. It's really hard (That's what she said! Sorry hahaha couldn't help but slip that in). I am loving the melee weapons.

Don't worry I studied. Not for physics though. That bitch is one tough motherfucker. I surrender. Besides cramming for it the night before, I'm not going to do anything else about it.

So I have integration left (the stupid Riemann shit). Buhbye all you nasty muggers. I hate closet muggers. Fuck all of you.

THE EXAMS ARE COMING! THE EXAMS ARE COMING!

2009-11-16T08:00:00.000-08:00

Now look who just popped her head out of ignorance's ass to announce it's spring? YEAH EXAMS ARE AROUND THE CORNER.

I can't wait for it to be over...I'm itching to get my hands on L4D2...it looks awesome. Like my possum. Melee weapons. I'm comfortable with the magical infinite-ammo-pistol but the melee weapons look fun. The chainsaw and electric guitar look especially satisfying to use.

Now why am I here blogging? Aren't I supposed to be studying? Well I've been doing that the whole day and I'm on my break now. Urgh. Back to studying in a while.

And Muse are coming to Singapore! And The Killers! And Yeah Yeah Yeahs! All early next year. Probably going for Muse. Bro's coming with me. YEAHHHH 2010 IS GONNA BE AWESOME

seriously?

2009-11-05T18:47:00.000-08:00

I am extremely pissed. I am appalled.

Reference No.: MM-EN-0907-0502

Dear Yee Chuang

We refer to the email on 16 July 2009.

With regards to your query, we would like to share that under the Rapid Transit Systems (RTS) Regulations, passengers who eat or drink in the MRT system are liable to a fine of up to $500.

We wish to take this opportunity to highlight that drinking of plain water, from own water bottle or purchased bottle drinks, is not allowed within SMRT Premises as some bottled drinks may look clear but are flavoured. Shall there be any special needs such as medication arise, please kindly approach our staff for assistance.

We hope to seek your understanding in this matter. We thank you for writing in to us and look forward in serving you better.

Yours sincerely,

Koh Hui Shan
Executive, Customer Relations
Corporate Marketing and Communications
SMRT Corporation Ltd
FUCK YOU.
When is 'too much' too much? Now.

this is why i love the muse boards sooo much

2009-11-05T06:47:00.000-08:00

HAHAHAHAAHAHA CAN'T.....BREATHE....

EPIC FAI- WINNNNNNN. FUCKING AWESOME

bloody test

2009-11-04T05:34:00.000-08:00

Stupid test comming up this Friday. Stupid chemistry...why did I take chemistry? I hate labwork, especially chemistry labwork. Biology labwork was more bearable. To be honest, I prefer maths. In fact, I like Maths. Especially in secondary school. So why am I doing chemistry? When I have more interest in biology (marine biology! I dive, for crying out loud), and show more interest in math? I don't know...it's a combination of many factors.

For one, at JC level at least, I was waaay more competent in chemistry than biology. But a part of me believes, and I hate to admit this, but I think it was because my chemistry teacher was excellent, and took no prisoners. I did my tutorials, paid full attention in lectures, and went for extra classes because the woman was a monster. A maneater. My bio teacher was lenient, and I liked him as a person, but his leniency (and my disdain for memory work and biology at the molecular level...boring) made me take the subject of biology too lightly. I would come to class unprepared, tutorials undone, aware of his disappointment in me. But I ignored it because I knew that my talent wasn't there. I spent too much effort in chemistry because I enjoyed doing the tutorials and wanted to be able to save my ass (or my friends' asses, because we save each other. In chemistry class, we need all the help we can get from our peers) when the maneater confronts you with a question.

Also, there is an industry centred around chemistry - drug synthesis. Also, the oil industry. Hence I would prbably be able to get a job.

I love biology (animals) but I showed more competency in chemistry. That is why I am here. Such is life. Practical versus ideal. Practical won this time.

Oh well I could always take up underwater photography as a hobby...it's the closest I can get to being a marine biologist. Plus the time of the month wouldn't be an excuse to not get in the water for female marine biologists...that would be ohrrible, diving during the time of the month....guess I made the right choice after all huh hahaha

Yeah right

nooooo

2009-11-02T08:11:00.000-08:00

I itch all over. Was it something I ate?

Nooooooooo it's back

'cari jodoh' is the theme song of my life

2009-10-29T07:11:00.000-07:00

Was having a nasty case of mental constipation. Now I shall relieve myself with some verbal (written) diarrhoea.

I feel extremely restless. I need a guy. You know what? I want a boyfriend! Yes, the manly, masculine, I-don't-need-to-guy-to-make-me-happy Hidayah is finally succumbing to her feminine desires. So, any takers? Who would want to take me? Look at me, I swear, I tend to think dirty, I'm not good-looking, and I would probably beat the guy at arm-wrestling (ok well I'll put up quite a fight). It rained when I wore a skirt. The sky was too shocked. (Look what NTU has turned me into. Boy-crazy and skirt-wearing. Oestrogen overload. Credit goes to Syift, Mary and Rab).

But a guy would like the girl to be tall, curvy, fair-skinned, with long flowy hair. Clothes that reveal a bit of skin would be good. Feminine. Fashionable. Bla bla bla. I'm the total opposite of all that. I can blow spit bubbles for crying out loud. Fuck it.

I need a boyfriend (I hate saying this sentence sooooo much. It's soooooo whiny and needy and so not me and URGHGHGHH). I need an overseas trip. I need to go on a few dives, I need to go to another gig.

Maybe I'm just having a mood swing...bloody period should be here annnnyyyy moment now...

P.S. I'm still waiting for my PADI c-card! Can't wait to get my hands on it...

finally...

2009-10-25T03:50:00.000-07:00

...I'm done with filing up my papers. Since school started I haven't been organising my stuff. Papers were here and there even during mid-terms. Now they're all sorted and I feel much better now. I'm gonna clean my room...then I'll have the mood to study. Mood is eveything. For me at least.

So this coming June (2010!), my family and I are heading to Pulau Redang. My first ever dive trip with pops. I think before that (maybe even only a few weeks before) I would have gotten my advanced open water course with NTU. Which I can't wait for. But if things go my way (*cough* period doesn't get in the way *cough*) maybe I would go for the February trip. We'll see. Plus, I wanna go with my bunkmates. Awesome bunch of people. Don't want to go to Redang with only open water certification because it's limited and that would mean my dad, as my buddy, won't be able to dive >~20metres. Don't wanna rain on his parade.

Okay time to clean up my room! Wish me luck...

stupid math mid-term. i didn't sign up for this! really.

2009-10-19T19:16:00.001-07:00

I surrender. If I can do the test, I can. If I can't, then I can't. It's just 20%.

I feel so much better now.

it's gonna catch up to me one day

2009-10-19T08:31:00.000-07:00

Math mid-term tomorrow. Still haven't started on revision. And I'll be going out for supper in 15 mins...(it's 11.30pm now). I don't feel like studying. Lately I'd do anything besides studying. Never mind, I'll work hard for finals.

Contemplated on skipping Chinese tomorrow to cram but I'm not gonna do that since I looooove Chinese. Well the classmates, at least.
Mexicans are fun.

of diving. recreational and commercial

2009-10-10T08:48:00.000-07:00

It feels odd stalking a stranger's facebook page. No he isn't a cute guy I'm crushing on. He's a professional photographer who, from what I can see, specializes in underwater photography. A mutual friend of 3 of my dive instructors. Amazing pictures! They make me want to dive right now. Speaking of which we (my family) went to the Waikiki dive shop today and looked at the equipment. Scubadiving is an expensive recreational activity. The full wetsuit I'm eyeing is $270. And don't get me started on the BCD...(I'm just ranting, I have no intention of getting a personal BCD...it requires servicing). The one which I looked at costs over $1000.

Speaking of BCDs my dad was talking about his days as a commercial diver. He mentioned an incident when he was just starting his job, he looked at his equipment, realized that there wasn't a BCD, and asked his colleagues (i.e. seniors) where they put it. His seniors all laughed at him and said "We don't use BCDs!" I was like :O (and then I laughed, it was nice to imagine my dad as a 'junior', or a noob, for lack of a better word) because no way am I diving without a BCD. I rely on it way too much hahaaha inflating it like crazy while I'm at the surface. Plus he used a twin tank! "You sink right away when you enter the water" Holy crap. Commercial diving is HARDCORE stuff.

Then there's the factor of the physical working environment. He usually did maintenance work on ships. So if commercial divers face problems while underwater (read: under a ship), they can't simply ascend to the surface like in recreational diving. "We have to find our way up". It's pitch black under a huge ship. You can literally lose your way like that :(

And then there's the helmet they use. It's heavvvyy. And you can't equalize the normal way (holding your nose and blowing it). So they equalize by swallowing which may not be as effective as the the normal method. Which is why "many commercial divers have hearing problems" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I have proof. My dad. Hahaha

Back to the dive shop. My dad enquired about the Sipadan sive trip...looks like I'm not tagging along this time. The trip is before semester break. :(

"You're going to Sipadan alone? Without your NEWLY CERTIFIED DAUGHTER?" - me to dad this afternoon

yeeaaaahhh

2009-10-05T09:15:00.000-07:00

Mum says she'll get me a wetsuit for my birthday. YEEEAAAHHH. My dad has one that he wore only once but it doesn't fit on me. Loose and tight at all the wrong places. Hence I'll get cold easily.

Mid-terms are here and I don't give a shit! Well, not much shit anyway.

Ze Tioman Dive Trip

2009-10-03T21:58:00.000-07:00

Pictures are owned by Jeremy/Isa, unless stated otherwise.

Friday 25 September 2009
I had planned to skip school that day but the stupid 113 test was moved to this day, so I didn't have any choice. Studied for a couple of hours before the test but I found it hard anyway. Major screw up. Test ended at 3.30 after which I had physics lecture but I skipped it and went home to settle some last minute stuff for the trip.

Reached the SRC grandstand at 5.30. While waiting for the housekeeping to be done I mixed around with the other divers. Before we finally left at about 7.30, we checked our dive bags and Linnet and I made the decision to take off our contact lenses because it was going to be a loooooong journey. I never regretted that decision.

Journey by bus to Mersing Jetty took about 3 hours. The boat ride to Tioman also took 3 hours. The boat is the same boat we used for diving.

Waiting for the boat

I actually planned to sleep during the boat ride but I couldn't sleep a wink although I was exhausted. So the bunch of us rigged up our equipment so that we didn't have to do it the next day. I made friends with one of the crew members. I didn't ask for his name! ARRGGH. He was cute la. I'll call him Mat for this entry. He helped me rig up my equipment. I could do it la. But I was a bit tired so I was moving a bit slowly. Hehehe. I wonder if he can dive.

Reached Tioman at 4.30am(!!!) and checked in Genting Resort. Note that the 'resort' is in no way similar to the luxurious hotels at Genting Highlands besides it being located on high ground (we had to climb up stairs just to get to the main area, and our room, the highest cabin, was a really steep slope away). Roommates were a crazy bunch and I was thankful for that. We washed our faces and brushed our teeth and collapsed into bed.

Saturday 26 September 2009
Woke up 2 hours later. Had breakfast (bread + butter + jam. Couldn't eat much. Too early in the morning) and then we had a dive briefing. Headed out to the diveboat for a pretty long ride to the divesite.

Long journey to divesite? Never mind, camwhore! L-R (Top): Alex, Eileen, yours truly. (Bottom): Erica, Mel

First 2 dives were purely skill evaluation dives. I was dreading the mask removal and putting it back on but it went smoothly (thank God). It was realllly nice being underwater, but on my first dive I got reallllly cold because we were just there kneeling on the seabed, holding onto the line (we were waiting for the others to finish their skills) and not moving much and I started shivering. One of the instructors noticed me shivering and mocked me. Hahaha. Thanks.

From my 2nd dive onwards, I used 4 weights instead of 3. I'm pretty buoyant.

Also, I forgot to defog my mask with toothpaste, so my mask kept fogging up and I had to clear my mask repeatedly. :( Cleaning the mask with saliva prior to diving does NOT work. Plus, it stinks.

3rd dive involved CESA, which I was dreading also but I did it well ("Well done!" - Sing)! After which we went on a leisure dive. This was my favourite dive, because I saw quite a lot of stuff, and I REMEMBERED TO DEFOG MY MASK WITH TOOTHPASTE! My mask was sooooooo clear and I didn't have to clear it even once! It was awesome. I love toothpaste. We played around with sea cucumbers. Man those things are fun. They are actually soft, but harden when you touch them Sounds familiar eh?The group I was in was really lucky, because we had Isa with us and he had an underwater camera. My first dive trip everrrr and I have pictures to prove it!

Rocking out underwater \m/

My favourite dive, the 3rd dive. Nemo says hi.

After the 3rd dive we went back to the resort. It was dusk when we started making our way back. It was beautiful.

Heading back. Sunset.

On the way back night fell. It was quite a long ride back so we went to the bow of the boat and sat around there. It was magical. Lying down on our backs, exhausted, nothing above us but the sky. Stars as far as the eye can see. You can never get that back in Singapore.

When we got back we had dinner. I didn't have much appetite to eat so I took a small serving. Mat saw me and he asked "Jage badan eh?" And I was like "Taklaaaa. Taknak bazir makanan." Hahaha. Some of the staff at the resort, who were fellow orang Melayu, smiled at me when they saw me. Some asked if I was Malay. I get that quite a lot. Also, I guess it's rare to find Malay divers, even more so for female diver Melayu. But I guess it's nice for the Malay staff to see a fellow orang Melayu picking up diving instead of the usual Chinese and Caucasians.

After dinner we showered and stayed in our room. We had actually planned to walk around the village but we were all tired.

Sunday 27 September 2009
Woke up at around 6+. Breakfast was at 8.30 (I can't remember clearly), but the morning prayers woke me up. Excited. Left with only 1 skill dive (navigation) and then 2 leisure dives. First dive was a leisure dive. I didn't defog my mask with enough toothpaste so it fogged up a bit. :( This time we descended without a line. Saw a huuuuugeass jellyfish. Also, we saw a really big pufferfish. Eileen was a couple of divers away so I signalled to Lionel instead. Hahaha. I signalled frantically. I was so excited. And he signalled back, smiling, "Yes, I know!" Hahaha.

Posing for pics in between dives. Credit goes to Linnet

5th dive was a skill dive. Navigation. Quite nervewracking. Before it was me and Eileen's (my buddy) turn we had to wait on the seabed. It was horrible. Sea urchins everywhere. It was especially bad for Eileen because she was wearing shorties and was more prone to getting stung. So she hovered above the seabed, with some help from Irvin. And there was a current, so it was pretty hard to stay in one spot.

Roomies chilling before a dive. L-R: Yours truly, Erica, Melissa, Eileen

There was once (I WILL NEVER FORGET THIS, EVER) I thought I lost Eileen when we were on the seabed. I looked around EVERYHWERE and couldn't see her, signalled to the pair close to me (I think they didn't understand). She was actually behind me. You see, with scubagear on, it is very hard to look behind you. Very cumbersome. Later, after we surfaced, Eileen told me she saw me looking frantically for her, and that she tapped on my tank and pulled on my fins. So THAT was why I felt my fins kept hitting something. I thought I was hitting some coral. During this dive, my sinus hurt. It got pretty irritating.

6th dive, The last dive. Sinuses still hurt. Bloody things wouldn't equalize properly. In the middle of the dive, after I don't know how many attempts at equalizing, they equalized with a satisfying squeeeaaaaak. Now that was relief. As usual, we played with sea cucumbers. When we surfaced we had a fucking long surface swim. And it started to rain. Excellent timing. It rains at the very end of our last dive. I was thankful it didn't rain during the trip, as it was approaching monsoon season. During that dive Alex and Zach dived sans wetsuit. Crazy boys.

Headed back to the resort and showered. Had dinner and met up at the dining area for a post dive briefing. Filled up our log books and got our temporary certification cards. Can't wait for my permanent one. And the advanced open water one. Hehehe. Then we headed out to the nearby coffee shop to eat. I had my first ever prata bom, the one Alex was gushing about. It's good. But as sinful as hell. It's a free ticket to a clogged up artery. The guys drank like there's no tomorrow.

Monday 28 September 2009
Time to go. As usual I was the first to get up. Freshened up, packed up the remaining stuff (wet clothes, toiletries. I packed up the previous night), and woke up the other girls. Had breakfast and got on the boat for the last time :( Sat on the top deck for the whole of the journey, chatting with the guys. Zach was going on a trip to Thailand immediately after this trip. So we were all talking about girly-boys and tiger shows (!!!). I contributed a fair bit about what I know about tiger shows. Hahahaha.

Heading back. L-R: Yours truly, Zach, Roy

It was a great trip. One of the highlights of this year. Met loooots of people. And I met my goal of being a certified diver before the end of this year. :)

For that weekend, Genting Resort belonged to us

just a taste of what's to come

2009-10-01T10:06:00.000-07:00

The full-length (and I really mean full length, look at my Bali entry in July/August, can't remember which) dive trip entry will come later. Now I'll just write about what I miss most about the trip.

The night boat ride back to the resort, with us sitting and lying down on the deck, staring at the endless starry sky. THAT was magical.

Making new friends. Everyone from fellow open water divers to the crazy instructors. Singaporean, American, whatever. Over there you're just a diver.

The dirty jokes. "Sea cucumbers", anyone?

My crazy roommates.

Sitting on the bench in the top deck of the boat while heading to/from the dive site and in between dives.

Jumping off the stern of the boat into the clear blue water in between dives, because "it's sooooo hot!" (I jumped in for fun).

And of course...the dives.
6 dives in 2 days. Being underwater is amazing. The marine life. The coral. And like Ivan said..."The thing I like best about being underwater is that everybody shuts up for once. There is peace, finally."

I'm totally up for advanced open water.

Dad's planning for us to make a dive trip to either Sipadan or Manado this December. I reallllly want to, but it's during the monsoon season. But I miss diving a whole lot.

vodkabilly

2009-09-29T07:05:00.000-07:00

I'm now qualified to scubadive now. YEAHHHHHHH

Will post an entry on the dive trip. Maybe. Not now.

I actually took a nap just now. Which is extremely rare. I guess I was extremely tired.

2009-09-15T06:25:00.000-07:00

I'm supposed to be studying for the math quiz tomorrow but I don't feel like it! Must be the pre-Hari Raya excitement.

So what has happened so far?

I went for the scubadiving pool session on Sunday. Even in the pool, I can tell you that scuba is AWESOME. The first time I breathed underwater...incredible. Not to mention the scuba gear looks cool! But ridiculously heavy. I'm pretty strong (hahaha) but my legs couldn't support me went I climbed out of the pool (ok, quite reasonable because I was in the pool for 4 hours nonstop).

Plus just now I went for iftar with the CBC Malay community! Finally the sombong girls (I'm part of this club) interact with the other Malays! I still haven't talked to some of the guys yet though.

are you STILL reading my blog?

2009-09-12T03:39:00.000-07:00

Oh. Hi. I'll "buka puasa" in about half an hour. Nasi Ayam Penyet (again). I buka puasa yesterday with NAP too. (Can't blame me. It's great stuff). With S and R (hahaha like the stereochemistry). Together we are HSR (haha like the real estate agency). M iftar with her other friends at Ang Mo Kio. Hmmph. Pembelot.

So tomorrow's my pool session. Nervous. Hope I'll do everything correctly. I'm worried about whether I should wear my contacts or not. I think I would. I'll just be careful to not let any water enter my eyes. Loooooong day tomorrow. 8.45am to 5pm. Excuse me if I come out of the pool looking like a prune.

looonng day tomorrow.

2009-09-07T07:57:00.000-07:00

I have an appointment tomorrow at 9.30 at ICA to collect my passport. I had to renew my passport because the picture on the current one does not resemble me anymore. I can't enter M'sia ever again with that passport because I "telah diberikan amaran. Tiga kali. Di sini, sini, dan sini". *Immigration officer turns the pages in my passport and show me the "change picture" warning* Then there's Chinese at 12.30 then Maths lecture at 4.30 to 6.30. Bullshit.

But the next day and the next (Thurs and Fri) are gonna be even longer because I have diving theory class till 11. PM. On Wed I have maths tutorial at 9.30. And on Thurs I start at 8.30am with Physics. It's gonna be a loooonnng week. Pool session on Sunday, 9am-5pm. Plus I have to mug for the knowledge review and quizzes and all that. Heh.

Speaking of which I went for equipment fitting just now. Not a lot of first-years. A whole bunch of foreigners (read: Swedes). I hope I'll have fun. But it doesn't matter. I'll definitely have fun with my Dad! Hopefully Bali again June 2010! LOOOOVVEEE BALI. Kenken kabare?

forensic medicine...

2009-09-02T06:51:00.000-07:00

...isn't for the faint-hearted.

Today's 811 lecture was special because we had a guest speaker. A Dr. something who is working as a forensic pathologist. It made me realize that it is not at all the glamorous job as potrayed in CSI. It's a morbid job. I'm sure most of the pathologists have ice in their veins. It's probably one of those jobs that, try as you might, you can't NOT bring home with you.

After a day of cutting up dead bodies....
Wife: How was your day, darling?
Pathologist: Awesome! It was soooo cool, there was this guy, he was tortured by the loansharks, he got his face torched, and his eyeball was hanging out!
Wife: I'm glad you had a great day at work, dear.

Hahaha. But I think it would actually be like this:
After a day of cutting up bodies...
Wife: How was your day, darling?
Pathologist: *Sighs* There was a child whose body was hacked into pieces and thrown into the river. He was part of a sacrifice.
Wife: *speechless*

:(

The story of the boy who was sacrificed is true.

And there were accounts of child abuse. We were shown a picture of a child's severely burnt knees, shins and thighs. It turned out that the child's parents made him kneel on the stove (!!!). And there was another picture of a girl who had blisters from being badly scalded on only the left side of her body. It turned out that someone held her right arm and leg and dipped her in boiling water. :(

The pictures were...gory to say the least. I've seen gory stuff but there were mostly in movies (i.e. Hostel) or petty real-life injuries. But a few hours ago, my eyes were given the displeasure of looking at decomposing bodies, lacerations, body parts, gunshot wounds, decapitated bodies, burns (chemical, dry, scalding). The worst was of a laceration (I think), of a motorcycle accident victim. It was of his face, and the flesh on the right side of it was horribly (an understatement) 'flared out'. I don't know how to put it in words. You'll have to see it for yourself (but you may have trouble keeping your lunch down).

It gave me more reason to never ever ever ever ride on a motorcycle. God.

There's a 113 test tomorrow. I've tried studying but I still don't really get it.

aiyoooooo

2009-08-31T03:19:00.000-07:00

Aiyoo I'm going to mug now. I still don't get resonance and arrows and minus charges and all that. And don't get me started on chair structures. And we're just getting started on this module. OCBC. I hope I get used to (and maybe even like) it.

Closet mugger is out of the closet.

Arrgghghghggghhhh.

At least there's Hari Raya and Tioman to look forward to. And next year I hope I return to Bali, this time visiting Tulamben and Nusa Penida also. And I'll be returning as my dad's dive buddy ;)

What...

2009-08-28T02:40:00.000-07:00

...the fuck is wrong with hotmail?

I can't open the mail, or look through the junkmail, or multi-delete stuff. I think I'll switch to gmail soon.

So today's the end of week 3. It's been ok so far. I'm going to mug this weekend though. For the CBC113 test. I'll have to practise drawing resonance structures and (dear God) chair structures. And, though it hurts me to say this...I'll have to go through my JC notes. God have mercy.

I still find the OCBC joke funny. NTU CBC does sooo much organic chemistry that we're called Organic Chemistry and Biological Chemistry (OCBC). Like the bank. Hahaha.

On a sidenote my mum's making murtabak for buka puasa today. So I'll be having that and kuih keria etc. WOW. Can't wait. And after that we'll have a night out. Hurray.

bulan ramadhan...

2009-08-25T06:58:00.001-07:00

...is here. That was quick. This year will be quite a challenge because nowadays my school hours are quite long, the campus is HUGE, and I walk to (and from) school. It's a 15 minutes walk, just a bridge and a garden away. I made it sound so magical.

Sometimes when I walk to school the sun will be shining like no tomorrow. And even if I walk reallly slowly, I'll be drenched in sweat by the time I reach school. So far school's been fine. But I have to start mugging soon. Especially when the tutors are crap :(

bulan ramadhan...

2009-08-25T06:58:00.000-07:00

...is here. That was quick. This year will be quite a challenge because nowadays my school hours are quite long, the campus ss HUGE, and I walk to (and from) school. It's a 15 minutes walk, just a bridge and a garden away. I made it sound so magical.

Sometimes when I walk to school the sun will be shining like no tomorrow. And even if I walk reallly slowly, I'll be drenched in sweat by the time I reach school. So far school's been fine. But I have to start mugging soon. Especially when the tutors are crap :(

major...

2009-08-23T07:51:00.000-07:00

...punk rock relapse. I can't remember the last time I went on a punk rock binge. Hahaha. OK it's mainly SID. I feel so angsty. With lyrics like

Welcome to the white town
Where money lust and sex
Fuck up your mind

Hah. Teen angst.

Must be the side effects of getting used to school. 3 hour lab session tomorrow. I hope it goes well.

school so far

2009-08-18T07:57:00.000-07:00

Blogger's all weird again. Never mind.

School so far has been ok. It takes some getting used to.

Chinese lesson was fun. My class was very cosmopolitan.

Germans, Dutch, Canadian, Mexicans, Indonesians, Japanese, Vietnamese, Brunei-an(?), Malaysians, and a whole bunch of Singaporeans. I have a feeling the Malaysian Chinese can speak Mandarin. They are lying. NOT FAIR.

I'm not even through the second week of school and already I've spent a bomb. ~$200 on books (and more to come), and $100 deposit for the dive lessons + trip. And later, the remainder of $425. Heh.

From what I've seen on the list for basic open water course the age range is quite large (19 to 25), and there's a whole bunch of Swedes. Probably the Swedish community in NTU all know each other and had already planned this. Or maybe the Swedes are diving enthusiasts. My dad mentioned he went on a dive with a couple of Swedes before.

Tomorrow there's maths tutorial. Then a 3-hour break. Then the monster 3 hour forensic science lecture followed by an hour-long biochem lecture (no break in between). Must prepare myself for the mental marathon.

please be nice to me.

2009-08-16T03:25:00.000-07:00

I'm done throwing stuff I wouldn't need anymore (i.e. JC lecture notes). I threw out GP skills stuff (I kept the content stuff for leisure reading), Geography (a pityful waste of money and trees), and most of the Bio lab stuff.

Feels great.

Later I'm going to read some JC Chemistry and Biology notes to refresh my memory. Tomorrow I have only one tutorial from 2.30 to 3.30 but before that I'm going to go to the NTU dive team booth and ask about the pool session. I'll ask if they can have 2 dates, one on Sep 12/13 and the other on Sep 19 (and we choose either one)...hopefully they can accommodate "female inconveniences". I'll choose the Sep 19 one. I know it's the eve of Hari Raya and I'll still be fasting, but I will NOT swim during the time of the month. NO TAMPONS PLEASE. I hope there'll be a lot of girls applying.

If not then I don't think I'll join the dive team. I'll pick it up on my own instead :(

Then after tutorial we're gonna look (and maybe buy) books for our courses. I saw the calculus book we're going to use at Kinokuniya and it costs $80! I'm getting mine secondhand for $20! Hope it's in a good condition.

aiayayaaiaia

2009-08-13T07:07:00.000-07:00

Blogger buat perangai lagi.

OK first few days of school went pretty smoothly, a few bumps here and there but they were pretty insignificant. Couldn't get any sleep last night. Must be that extremely bitter iced latte I drank the previous day. Strong stuff. Note to self: Don't drink any caffeinated product from that cafe. It'll keep you up all night.

So the past 2 days just seemed like a reallllly long day to me. Especially long because just now was a 8.30 to 5.30 day. Hardcore. I was supposed to go home during my 11.30 to 3.30 break but I didn't feel like going home so I crashed 111's lecture.

After crashing 111 me and Mariana and Lani went around the campus to do some housekeeping matters. Buy lab stuff (me, L, S), collect ez-link (M), enquire about matric card (L). I realized when I typed out their intitals they stand for small, medium and large, haha.

And I completely switched off during the ~2hr 121 lecture though...I was fighting the drowsiness off. And I'm going to dig up some bio notes from the notes-coffin I have under my table. After 9 months I'm completely out of touch with a lot of stuff. I'll start with bio first since 121 covers lots of it. And while I'll dig up the notes grave I'll dispose of some notes I'll definitely won't be needing anymore:

-Geography (go to HELL, you useless pieces of paper, so many trees died to make these worthless pieces of shit, you remind me of my D, and not that D, but the lousy one
-PW (Done)
-GP
-and few more, which I may dispose of throughout my 4 years in ntu

I thought I was going to pay attention in 111 (I've been exempted from cbc111 but I wanted to refresh my memory) but ended up updating my timetable in the iPod. Handy stuff. I have a whole semester planned in my iPod now. Love it even more than before, yeah, I didn't think it was possible too.

I hope I get used to Japanese and mainland Chinese accents though. And I hope I won't be spending a bomb on a bunch of tomes...those beasts are as thick as they are expensive.

OK I finally gave in and registered for Chinese elective. Because my mom has been bugging me to do so, Syifa convinced me, and among other reasons, the electives I was considering prior to registering for Chinese were oversubscribed. No vacancies. Bloody kiasu. I wanted German. Or French. Or Spanish. Or this tourism thing. Or astronomy thing. And, the one reason I changed my math index no: cbc212. Fuck it. Can't get it. So troublesome. But it's ok I guess because some I've heard seniors regretting taking 212 (year 2 core module) in year 1.

OK will be compensating on my previous night's lack of sleep soon. But not before I indulge myself in some Bobby Kool (He's cute, and those dimples just did it for me)

ANGKAT GELAS KITA BERSULAAAAAANNNG

Yes, I know what bersulang means

spare me

2009-08-09T07:23:00.000-07:00

School's starting on Tuesday. I have no idea whether I should attend the CBC212 lecture, because i'm not registered for it. But I plan to take it to replace CBC111 which I've been exempted for. Might as well get a headstart on Year 2 modules.

I'm nervous. I haven't studied for 9 months now. I am out of touch. I've seen a bit of the MAS181 lecture notes and I feel like I'm out of my depth. MAS181 starts at 4.30 to 6.00pm. Will take some getting used to this kind of timing.

And on certain days I'll have lots of time in between lectures and tuorials. Since I live near school, I might go home to take a shower.

unofficial first day

2009-08-06T09:11:00.000-07:00

What happened today, in brief (hahaha I said brief):
-attempted to walk to LT1A from home
-attempted to take a short cut through all the buildings
-got hopelessly lost
-abandoned Operation Shortcut and resorted to Operation Bloody Longcut
-climbed up 1231414132km of uphill road
-miraculously didn't melt from the sun (it was 12 noon)
-Mariana called me, struggled to hide my breathlessness
-reached LT1A, couldn't see direct enntrance
-saw a fellow lost comrade, joined forces, hence making a new friend
-learned comrade's name, found out we're both in CBC
-climbed up a side staircase, which wasn't supposed to be used
-reached destination, sweating like nobody's business (except the Sweaty Mafia)

Lesson of the day: Never walk from home to any building in North Spine. Learnt from M to take bus 179 from City Harvest Church. Information stowed away for future use.

Thankfully SPMS building is near Yunnan Garden. SPMS building looks nice. Actualy went in it as part of Operation Shortcut but abandoned it as soon as exit couldn't be found. In the process I tried my best not to look lost, wondering whether I looked stupid.

But all in all a great day. Made me want to go back to school and make new friends, and join diving. Dreading lab sessions, but I will force myself to get use (and maybe even enjoy) it. Force myself to enjoy. A paradox. Hmm. Food for thought.

pening

2009-08-04T21:38:00.000-07:00

I'm a bit dazed right now. Just when I thought I was done planning my timetable (tedious shit, so many things to factor in), considering if I fulfilled my minimum AUs and all that, I click on the modules under my course and BAM I see math and physics modules there. What the fuck. I hope I can survive physics. The last time I touched anything related to physics was 5 years ago. I sucked badly at it, failed like no one's business. Usually I would have only myself to blame but I think if you checked with my fellow classmates (particularly those that ended up in the life sciences stream), they'd say that our teacher sucked big time.

I've already excluded a module from my timetable since I've been exempted from it. But I don't know whether to include MATH and PHYS modules which are under my course, because I don't know if they are GER PE/UE or CORE modules. Then I'm planning to take up French, which I hope I can get, since it's extremely popular. If not then maybe German or Spanish. Then I planned to take up MAS112 which is calculus, and it looks like what I've studied before. But this was before I heard rumours of the compulsary math and phys modules we have to take. I don't know laaaa

I hope they clear things up tomorrow so that by add/drop courses day, I'll know what to do, and not panic.

dog-tired...

2009-08-02T06:45:00.000-07:00

...So why am I here blogging again? Ask me another day/night.

Went for a swim just now. Not the petty dip in a small sized pool. I managed 2 laps non-stop. SHOULD NOT have done that. Never attempt laps when you haven't done some recently. Now me muscles are screaming out. Especially the area where swimmers usually develop 'wings'...which I don't really find attractive.

I think I'll swim every week...just to build my stamina. Don't want to finish my oxygen tank in the middle of a dive. My water confidence is perfectly fine...I've been swimming since I can remember. Ask me to jump from a boat in the middle of the ocean, and trust me, I will (actually, I've done that before, much to my mom's horror).

Been listening to even more SID. Just their Bahasa Indonesia stuff. I avoid their English stuff...as much as I like them, I can't get past their accents (though I acknowledge that English is their 3rd language, in addition to 1st language Basa Bali and 2nd language Bahasa Indonesia)...Their Indo stuff is top-notch though. Lead singer is very cute. And I am digging the drummer's physique...but they are both 32 oh noooooooo

Plus we were watching ST 12's video and my mom was commenting on how the lead singer's ("si tindik") voice was nice, but his delivery of Cari Pacar Lagi on APM was like lagu keling. Hahaha. I said I liked his voice and that I thought he was cute, and I asked her opinion on ear piercings on a guy (me likey) and she said she was fine with them, if the guy is young. Hahaha. Note that my dad has his left ear pierced ("menyampah!")

Have to turn in now...got an early morning tomorrow...

worthless post

2009-08-01T22:27:00.000-07:00

I've been watching The City lately. I told myself I'd hate it because the people in it seem to lead such extravagant lifestyles. Going to parties, shows, working in the fashion industry, tea parties, etc. But I can't help it. From what I've seen so far it's nicer than The Hills (mostly due to the absence of Heidi and Spencer. I hate those attention whores with a fiery burning passion). The people are extremely good-looking, which leads to my suspicions of this show being merely a quasi-reality show. They probably change into outfits, have their makeup done, etc. Really now, Captain Obvious?

Olivia is so full of herself. I hope I never meet anyone like her (and her dreadful cousin Nevan. What a jerk. Or maybe bitch. He seems gay to me). She is extremely gorgeous though. But she acts like she's some CEO of a company when she's only in public relations (I think). Her parents probably shower her with money and all that. "It's a very different group." The effects of being born with a silver spoon in your mouth.

Superman Is Dead - Bukan Pahlawan

2009-07-30T08:44:00.000-07:00

Just went out with the girls. HQ, Rai, and Nia. Ate at Pastamania. My first time. For a restaurant that prides itself on its pasta their beef bolognese isn't very good. The pasta at Fig and Olive was way better. I told HQ this and she kindly reminded me that I kept nicking some of Dao Min's some time ago. Said goodbye to HQ who's leaving on Aug 2. See you again soon!

And Rai's leaving for Bandung ("Isn't that a drink?" asked HQ) soon too. All of us are going separate ways. Such is life. Rai take me to Bandung with you. Lots of great bands come from Bandung. Plus it has a cool climate. And great shopping. Anywhere but Singapore. Don't get me wrong it's a great country and all, and my family and friends are all here...but the grass is always greener on the other side I guess.

Been listening to SID recently. My first taste of Indo punkrock. They're cool. Lastfm did its job of finding new bands for me to listen to. But i think that SID would be my last new discovery for a while because the stupid 30-track trial is finished. Bukan Pahlawan on loop. Decided to look them up. And guess what? SID are from Bali. Coolness factor x10. Drummer and vocalist are hot. I kept telling myself I hate tattoos but that was just denial...I'm oddly drawn to them. Suka bad boy konon. Kalau aku bawak balik bad boy confirm kena tampar.

L-R: Bassist Eka Rock, Vocalist/guitarist Bobby Kool, DRUMMER JERINX.
As you can see I'm enthusiastic about the drummer. His real name is Gede something. Hahaha. Familiar name. Nipple piercings for the win.

Shall be turning in now. JB tomorrow + excited about matriculation. Merepek jer. Pasal benda kecik pun nak excited. But before I go here's a pic of an outing a few weeks back...courtesy of Nia's cousin, who works there (whom she managed to speak to after much debate and disbelief ["Siti. He is your cousin. How can you not talk to him?"]).

phew

2009-07-27T08:44:00.000-07:00

I finally got Mendaki's letter. So my application got through! I was worried I filled up some stuff incorrectly, or that it got lost in the mail or something. And the NTU admission page said it received my tuition grant application. Another phew. If it didn't get through, it would mean paying $20 000++ per year. God.

On another note, I went out with my sec 2 friends a couple of weeks back for dinner... It was great catching up. They're still my favourite bunch of people.

108/204

flu

2009-07-26T21:12:00.000-07:00

Stuck at home with the bloody flu. Nose is running like a burst pipe. Eurgh.

On a lighter note I went to the flea market at clarke quay. Nicer than the one at Haji Lane. I got 3 t-shirts for $10. Must be prepared for university. Dreading the lack of uniform. Ain and Aishah got a bunch of cool clothes too. The flea market extended into a pub. The guy selling beer at the entrance kept asking if we wanted some. It was only 5pm. But many people were drinking already.

Looked at shoes in charles and keith. I think I'm gonna get this pair I've been eyeing. They look great and painful.

Then Ain and Azri had to go. :( Azri was tired.

Then me and Aishah went to JP. She told me about uni life. Very intimidating.

anticipation

2009-07-21T09:14:00.000-07:00

University is starting soon. Getting nervous. At least it's 4 years. Not as compressed as JC. Won't be taking it easy. I'll work hard. But I won't be too hard on myself though. Or I won't enjoy my time in uni. Which was what happened in JC :( There's scubadiving to look forward to. Even if I don't join NTU Divers I'll learn it with Ain. Hehehehe wheeee.

And I think something's wrong with blogger, because the posting page has gone all wonky and I can't find the icon to post pictures :\

The long overdue Bali entry. Read if you dare.

2009-07-21T06:54:00.000-07:00

BALIIIIIIIIII

Day 1.
Departed Changi at around 10+. Arrived at Ngurah Rai Int Airport at 1+.
Walked past a row of money-changers. All of them holding out the day's exchange rates and calling out to tourists to change money at their counter. A bit of a culture shock to me. Is this a taste of Bali's famous touters?

First-timers, from L-R, 44, 18, 11 years old. What the fuck is up with my cheeks.

Driven to the hotel/resort. Saw kites in the sky everywhere. Was told that this was how Balinese children and adults alike pass their time. Checked in the hotel. Me and my bro shared a room. It was waaaay better than my parents' room. Unpacked and took a taxi to Kuta. The taxi driver, Made (Ma-day) offered to bring us around the next day for 300 000 rp. That's about S$42. Walked around the streets of Kuta. It really is a tourist trap. Aussies everywhere. Some have even stayed here and blended in with the locals. I saw a family of orang bule (caucasians) on a scooter. Mum, dad, daughter, son. Just like a Balinese family. Went to a shopping complex called Matahari. It's nothing like Takashimaya or Jurong Point but it's the largest one around. Ate at A&W's. Very nostalgic.

Day 2.
Made the taxi driver from the previous day picked us up at about 10am. First stop was Bali Safari and Marine Park. The area accessible on foot was rather small. Visitors could take pictures with a lioness and a tiger. I wanted to but my ticket didn't include phototaking with animals :( After walking around and watching the Animal Show we went on the safari, which was the highlight of the zoo. The safari bus took us through a special route accessible only by the bus or Elephant Ride (which is waaaay cooler!). Saw a sleeping tiger trio. The female one was sleeping on her back, front legs on either side of her head and her hind legs spread wide. Her back was slightly propped up on a beam so her position was human-esque. It was quite funny. The guide made a joke about her "feeling happy". Hahaha.

Afterwards we drove through Ubud (the cultural centre of Bali). The were wood/metal/stone sculptures along the roads. Very beautiful. The Balinese are very artistic. Then we visited a batik gallery. There were women printing batik outside the main building. The process is so painstaking! There were stages in the process where it doesn't even look like the final product, wrong colours and such, but the final product is beautiful. I bought a pair of batik slippers as souvenirs.

Went back to the hotel and rested a bit. Then we took a taxi to Kuta Beach. The mother of all tourist traps. It was like the quintessential beach you see on TV, you know, white sand which stretches for miles and miles, perfectly straight, with people sunbathing and playing beach volleyball...And the waves! They were huge! I could see why Bali is a prime surfing destination. It was nice, but I hated the fact that it was soooo crowded. With tourists. Then after walking around we ate at Pizza Hut. It's across the road from Kuta Beach so it was nice. Great service. You don't get it in Singapore. Then we walked around and I got my "hey look I'm a tourist" t-shirts. I heart Bali and one of those Bintang beer t-shirts you will definitely see everywhere when you're in Bali. A must-have. Went back to the hotel and had a swim in the pool. Night swims are the bomb.

Day 3
The highlight of the trip. Water sports. Driven to Pandawar Beach. I think it was called that. It's near Nusa Dua or something. First activity of the day was parasailing.

Sarah Palin. *cough*. I mean parasailin'

Komang helped me put on my harness. Komang means 'third child', but I'll get back to that later. He was one of the first beach-type Balinese guys I met. Dark skin and bleached blond hair about chin-length. Toned body (of course I notice these things), but not my type (hehehe). As he put on my harness on he looked at me and said "Cakep!". And me, not extremely well-versed in Bahasa Indonesia, thought that he said "cakap", which means "speak", and I looked at him strangely (and resisted the urge to cock my head to one side) and stupidly said "Cakap apa?" ("Say what?/ What do you want me to say?") What a blonde moment. Then he clarified, "cantik" , and I was flattered (and not convinced). And I was panicking thinking he wanted me to say some parasailing jargon ala 'belay' in climbing. I thought I missed out on some parts of his briefing. Then it was up up up in the air I went. It was nice flying over the sea. Could see the clear water and coral reefs.

Then it was jet-skiing. I admit I was quite nervous, because we went reallllly realllly far from shore, and I had to navigate my way through speedboats and diving boats and all that. Then we went on this thing called 'fly-fish' an odd name, because it has nothing to do with flyfishing. It's basically a large float being pulled by a speedboat, and the float, when it goes fast enough, flies a few metres over the water. Fun stuff.

Snorkelling was next. We had about 20 minutes break before this. Saw a really hot guy laying out snorkelling gear for 4 at the equipment shed, so I assumed the gear was for us. Short blond hair and super toned body. Not too buff, or too thin, or too tall, or short. Just nice. My type of guy (HAHAHAHAHA). Didn't think much of the guy though. Thought he was only putting out our gear. I was hoping he'd be our guide at some point, but didn't think much of it. But lo and behold (I remember feeling extremely happy) he signalled to us to come over and try on our gear. Got a better look at him, and (go ahead, roll your eyes) he was seriously hot. Wondered for a moment (a moment?) what it would be like to have him for a boyfriend. He had tattoos on his back. Australia, with 2 koi fish, one on the top and one on the bottom of Australia. Some words too but can't remember what (I wonder why). On the boat he introduced himself as Gede. He pronounced it as G'day and I wasn't sure how to spell it but that after my vacation I watched this programme and it was about Bali, and there were at least 3 people named Gede. He said "Nama saya Gede, anak Bali nombor satu (literally, My name is Gede, Balinese first-born)" and I knew what he meant, but I had no idea why he said that. It seemed like an irrelevant piece of information to me. I imagined introducing myself to somebody like this : "My name is Hidayah, I'm the first-born". It sounded really weird. So I guess he was trying to tell us that Gede meant first-born, and not "I'm Gede, and I'm the first child", but "I'm Gede, which means first-born".

So, if I was Balinese, my name would be Gede too, or Wayan or Putu. After one of those 3 names it's Made, Kadek, Nengah for the second-born, then the third-born would be Nyoman or Komang. Then the fourth child would be Ketut (Hahahaha. I remember Yusuf the driver saying this and I chuckled a bit). Then you rinse and repeat. Fifth child is Gede and so on. It's like the Balinese equivalent of the Malay "Long, Ngah, Uda"...etc.) Before you go "Then how do people differentiate themselves?", they also have clan names, and a prefix. I for males and Ni for females. But don't trust me. All this info is a mishmash of internet, tv, and Gede and Yusuf's words.

Snorkelling was nice. We travelled further than the other snorkelling boats because Gede said "there was nothing to see" where the other boats were. Yeah there were loads of fish but the coral was disappointing. It was nothing like what I saw while snorkelling in Redang 13(!!!!) years ago. So it was all white. Water was clear though. But there was a bit of current.

Snorkelling. Should have taken off lifejacket. Stupid thing.

Gede took pictures and videos. His English is a bit strange. He adds -ing to many verbs. Like, when telling me to pose underwater for the camera, he said "Looking down!" Hahaha. I'm afraid that I think I took advantage of him. My mask had water and was fogged up. So I took it off and Gede saw me fumbling with it, and asked if I needed help. I could clean it myself, but I asked him to help anyway. :) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Yeah I thought he was that hot. And I had some trouble taking of my right fin (I was still in the water), but nothing I couldn't deal with. He offered to take it off for me (oooh pity it was in a different context though) and I accepted of course. Getting on the boat I almost slipped and fell (I mentally went CHEEBYE) because it was wet and slippery (cue Bon Jovi. You don't get it? They have an album called Slippery When Wet) but luckily he held my hand. :)

Me and dad.

Then we went to Turtle Island. Getting off the boat Gede asked me how old I was. I said 19 (OK so I'm still 18). I couldn't really tell how old he was....maybe 23? They had a facility where they kept turtles (from what I could deduce, hawksbill or green turtles), hence the name of the island. And maybe turtles come to lay their eggs there. Tourists take pictures with them, and they struggle and stuff. I admit, I took pictures with them and all that, but I do not support keeping them in captivity as props for tourist pictures. But I don't know...maybe they breed them and stuff, so maybe they are helping the turtles. There were fruit bats and pythons and iguanas and monitor lizards and toucans and eagles. All of which I took pictures with (except the monitor lizard. People weren't allowed inside there, because it was a male).

It knows it's adorable.

Then we ate at the coffee shop. Drank a bottle sprite and ate some fries. Bought a shark tooth necklace. Ogled at penis carvings. Wondered if they were part of the culture or some prototype dildos (pardon my disrespect and ignorance). Resisted the urge to ask my mom for some rp to buy one. Gede sat with us and talked. Asked how old he was. 25. OK what....not that far from 19. Hehehehe. Was busy looking at the souvenirs when he patted my shoulder and told me to "look after your dad". I was like "Why?" and then he said his father passed away last year :( I felt a huge surge of sympathy for some guy I met a couple of hours ago.

Then it was back to the beach. I took a quite shower to rinse off the saltwater and saw another guide putting out dive equipment. This one hot also. I think I am desperate la. Seriously. Dah melampau. But he was cute. Very nice facial features. Great smile. Earrings on both ears. A bit chubby though. Just a bit. But i find it endearing. Had his divesuit up till his waist. HUGE tribal-esque tattoo covering his back. I wanted to pee but I didn't think it was urgent. So we got on the diveboat. Asked for his name. Made. Second one I met during my trip. Dad and Made dived for 45 minutes+++. ++++ because my dad experienced problems with his fin and it took Made 15 minutes to fix it. Dad said Made was "like a fish" underwater.

Dad and a fishy camwhore.

Feeding time. Note the so-so visibility. :(

While those 2 were enjoying what Mother Nature has to offer underwater I was having an epic battle with my bladder and its accomplice. The evil duo. Bladder and Urethra. I couldn't hold it in any longer. I had no qualms about peeing in the ocean. I politely asked the boatman to lower the ladder for me so I could pee. I sacrificed my dignity. It was that bad. So I climbed in the water, ignoring the thought of fishes gnawing on my ass (we had just fed the fishes with bread, so there were PLENTY of them). I thought I would finally be granted respite from the pressure in my bladder, but the urethra JUST WOULDN'T COOPERATE. I'm not sure if it's even the urethra. Maybe some spincter or whatever. I tried twice. The poor boatman had to lower the ladder and remove it twice because of me. So I dipped my ass in the great blue for nothing.

MUST. HOLD. PEE. IN. ENDURE. BLADDER. SPASMS. MUST.

When the 2 of them came back I told my dad I really really really had to pee (Abah, HIDAYAH NAK KENCING SEKARANG JUGAK!!!!) Made overheard me and he gave me this mischievous grin. Oh, OK la, go ahead and laugh. Hmph. Even in my agony and dignity-free moments my mind registered his cuteness. As soon as the boat reached shore I made a break for the toilet, running as fast as I could without sprinting to the toilet. Thank God it was near. On the way there Gede saw me in the race of my life and he teased "Ah, ni mesti mau ke toilet!" (Ah, you must be heading for the toilet!) and I laughed and said ya and almost ran in the men's room. Fuck. The 4 masseuse saw me and laughed. Argh.

After I relieved myself (it was an extremely long pee. I shouldn't have drank that whole bottle of sprite) I changed into my I love Bali t-shirt. And shorts. My parents insisted I got a massage from the masseuse, and instead of being massaged by one I got attacked by the whole swarm of them. All 4 of them went to work on me, kneading me like roti prata. Actually I didn't want a massage but I was pretty knackered after the whole day (especially from snorkelling, with the current and all that) so I gave in. Then we said goodbye to the guides. Komang and Gede were there to say goodbye. Both of them hit on me. They have horrible taste. Komang kept saying "please don't forget me". Hahaha. And Gede said "nice t-shirt". I think he was proud that I declared my love for his country. Maybe he was staring at my chest. (You see, the t-shirt is quite tight, and showed more of my chest than my loose wetsuit. I'm ashamed of myself). Then he said that "you should change it to 'I love you'". Hehehehe. Alaaa I love you too la. Ish melampau budak ni!

Then it was off to dinner we went. My God the place was beautiful. The restaurant is on the beach. The beach is like Kuta Beach, very long and straight, but not crowded. The driver, Yusuf, called it Sunset Beach.

Picture doesn't really do it justice.

Duck + mother on the Sunset Beach

Food was great. Very fresh. I said I wanted Long Island Iced Tea, and my mom said ok (well the name sounds innocent enough). My dad overheard and he was like NO! Hahaha. The waiter! very handsome! I was on a roll that day. Lady Luck was smiling upon me.

Outside the restaurant

Then we walked on the beach to catch the sunset. But it was a bit cloudy so it wasn't perfect. Saw a jellyfish beached on the sand. Looked like a plastic bag. But upon closer inspection (and some serious squinting), I am 100% sure it was a jelly. Went back to the hotel. Watched Surf's Up. Very fitting because I saw a lot of surfers.

Day 4
Departing. Not much happened. Very sad. I didn't want to leave. Had to drown a fantasy of me living there with Gede/Made, working as a guide, working on the beach all day. Now I really need a slap (or a boyfriend! OK NOW I really need a slap) Not earning much, but doing recreational diving/snorkelling all day with tourists...very fun.

If you read through the whole of this entry, you must
a) be out of your mind
b) have too much time on your hands
c) be fucking nosy
d) all of the above

If c) is your answer, it's ok, because i can be quite nosy myself.

Now excuse me while I indulge in some Indonesian meat. *Cough*.

sial betul ah

2009-07-21T01:43:00.000-07:00

Sometimes my body just won't cooperate with me. I didn't sign up for SPMS camp because, when I calculated, and factored in allowances and all that (like in case it comes earlier, later), it definitely would clash with the camp, causing horrible inconveniences. But cheebye it came waaay too early which means, during SPMS camp, I wouldn't be having that thing, which means I could have signed up for it. Sial nak mampos ah I wanted to go. But it's too late now. Fuck my life.

oooooh

2009-07-13T22:44:00.000-07:00

I went for my medical checkup already! Phew.

Meeting the girls later. At Northpoint. Urgh. About Northpoint I mean.

hooray

2009-07-13T06:43:00.000-07:00

I've been exempted from 3 courses for NTU Chem! A total of 11 AUs. Heh now I feel more satisfied about my A in Chem.

And 2 out of 3 of those courses involve labwork, so less labwork for me. I shouldn't be exactly happy about this because my job is probably gonna involve loads of labwork. :(

shit

2009-07-13T03:10:00.002-07:00

Urgh my stomachache is back. It had better be gone by tomorrow because I'm having my med checkup. Don't want shit to appear in the urine samples eh?

I think it was the milk. If so, this stomachache has been persisting for about 3 or 4 days already! Leave me alone!

My mom's bringing me there because after that we're going to Toa Payoh...everyone's going to think I'm a mummy's girl.

OOOOOO THANK GOD

2009-07-12T19:35:00.001-07:00

I'm finally free from the blasted stomachache that's been bothering/traumatising me for 2 whole nights (thank god it didn't bother me yesterday). It's the diarhoea-type of stomachache. It would have been ok if I actually took a shit, but the problem was, I couldn't. You know how when you wanna pee, like you REALLY REALLY have to go, and you have no choice but to do it in uncomfortable circumstances (i.e. in the ocean, with people around you), and the blasted pee just won't come out, even though you're busting for a pee (trust me I know what I'm talking about)?

Yeah the same thing (except it wasn't pee, but number two) happened for 2 nights (and this morning), even though I ate a whole lot, and I could take a dump comfortably. And just now I just did! It was the motherlode.

If you just read the whole of this entry, I congratulate you for doing so, for I am sure it required guts. And nerve. Why I'm blogging about this? Because it's cathartic. I just experienced the greatest sort of relief ever.

urgh.

2009-07-09T05:48:00.000-07:00

Next time, when I'm having an upset stomach, I won't drink milk. It may taste good, but it'll just make the problem worse. And, if the milk is slightly sour, don't drink it, even if the expiry date's a week away.

Bugger of a stomachache won't go away! Cheebye.

Another reason why I love Stockholm

2009-07-09T00:40:00.001-07:00

Epic flash mob. MJ would be proud.

memories

2009-07-08T07:48:00.000-07:00

I am currently on a Sheila on 7 and peterpan binge. I know they are not the Indonesian 'it' bands anymore but I have a soft spot for them (particularly Ariel, that man is HOT, why is he already married and divorced and he already has a child damn it, but I digress).

Just listening to them triggers memories of me commuting to BP almost everyday. I'll be rushing to catch the bus/mrt and 'Seberapa Pantas' would be playing. Or I'll be on the mrt after a long day of school and 'Ku Katakan Dengan Indah' would be calming me down. I love that song. I can play it over and over again and I'll never get tired of it.

Right now, it is bringing back memories of Bali, and I really want to go back.

2009-07-07T08:01:00.000-07:00

My cousin just gave me an idea! Since I want to pick up scubadiving, I think I'll join NTU Scuba club! Hmmm...must check it out first. Since Ain wants to learn with me, maybe we'll still do a crash course in Tioman in March. If she changes her mind, I'll join NTU scuba.

Update :

Looks like I just roped in another one. Shafiq's interested. I'm gonna ask Hakiim too. Dunno about Salleh, as he's in ns.

If at least Ain confirms (she did, but circumstances may change) by the time NTU scuba is recruiting, I'll pick up scuba with her, not join NTU scuba this year, and join in Aug 2010.

If no one can pick it up with me, I'll join NTU scuba this August. Which means earlier dive trip with daddy! OK dilemma solved!

cheebye

2009-07-06T06:59:00.000-07:00

What the fuck. I want to go for NTU SPMS FOC but the date clashes with the arrival of my 'friend'! Confirm kena during that date...I made calculations already. Alamak macam mana niiiiiiiiii

Sometimes I wish I was a boy. Hmph.

2 posts in a day. a rarity

2009-07-04T10:15:00.000-07:00

Okay so it's technically already 'tomorrow' as it's 1.15am.

Just came back from the beach. One of our family activities. A monthly trip to the beach. At night. I love it. It's usually East Coast park, Changi Beach or West Coast. Tonight was my favourite. Changi. Because it's far from home and it's near the airport. I like looking at planes. A month back I would be looking at the planes land with envy, bitter about not having been on one yet. But now, even after being on one, the eagerness to travel is still there, stronger than ever.

Had a family talk. The usual stuff, about studying hard so that we (me and lilbro) could get good jobs so that we can travel all the time, in business class, etc. Lilbro's 'encouragement session' got a bit heated up. It's already July and I still haven't seen any genuine effort from him. If he doesn't do well it means a mediocre school, normal stream, bad influence, mediocre job, bla bla bla. Also, in the short term, it would mean lesser vacations, and I may have to learn scubadiving alone.

Reminisced about recent trip to Bali, how we all want to go back there again, how amazing the people are (gracious, humble, friendly, multilingual, etc).

Sometimes, I feel sorry for my brother. Yet again, sometimes he really asks for it. Why does school have to be so demanding? I wish we were born earlier.

oh hurry up, december

2009-07-04T04:47:00.001-07:00

Dear HQ is now a qualified scubadiver! No fair! I'm supposed to be qualified first (you see, my dad is a scubadiving enthusiast, and we have been talking about this for a LONG time)! Just joking. I'm very happy for her. My dad said he'll sign me up for lessons in December. A 4-day crash course in Tioman. Can't wait. This time, I'll keep reminding him that I'm serious.

Just thinking about it makes me happy! I need to get qualified fast. Before all the coral in the seas and oceans get bleached. Very sad. I'll need to get a diving mask with optical lenses too. Don't want to miss out on all the action just because I'm near-sighted.

Can't wait to see HQ and my other favourite girls!

change in taste. no...maybe an expansion (oooh!)

2009-06-30T08:47:00.000-07:00

I think I have developed a taste for Balinese men. Ahem. Paricularly those that work on the beach. Next time I go there I'm gonna keep my eyes on the locals, and ignore the obnoxious Aussies.

I am really whining now. I want to go back. And blend in. I do look like a Balinese. We are all Orang Nusantara after all. By the way, while I was there, the locals would assume us to be either Malaysian or from Jakarta. Singaporean tourists are mostly Chinese...so it's quite understandable.

On another note, I want to visit Bawean Island (known in Singapore and Malaysia as Boyan), an island off Surabaya, which is where I'm descended from. I want to speak the language and see the people there.

oh boohooo sob

2009-06-30T07:53:00.000-07:00

I'm missing Bali big time. Particularly Pandawa Beach. I wish I could just live there as a surfer girl or some water sports guide or whatever.

And stay with Gede. :D This is odd. He sticks around in my mind. Must be some Balinese charm.

:(

And I am itching to go snorkelling again! And get my scuba license!

Back from Bali

2009-06-28T07:59:00.000-07:00

Yes Bali was great.

I'll (probably) post a full-length entry later (no guarantees!). When my nail polish is completely dry and after a get a good night's sleep. Time passes by really fast. I miss Bali. I'm fascinated by the people there.

They look like you and me (if you're Malay), but they practise Hindusim. They make offerings to their God(s?) 3 times a day in the form of a tray made of leaves with food and maybe flowers inside and leave them everywhere. I had to be careful to not step on these things. Many of them are at least bilingual, and some of them can speak 5 (!!!!!) languages. Bahasa Indonesia, Italian, French, English, Japanese, in addition to Balinese.

On Day 3 we went to Pandawa Beach and I was lucky to get two hot guys as our guides. Made was our guide/divemaster for scubadiving (my dad only. I'm not qualified YET). I thought he was cute but a little chubby (like me) and Gede (mind you, I don't know how to spell his name. It's pronounced as G'day and it means firstborn. Also, note that the Balinese have their own language and script, although most of them can speak Bahasa Indonesia and some English) was our guide for snorkelling and our visit to Turtle Island. I liked Gede. Hehehehehe. I don't usually like guys with platinum blond hair and dark skin but he was smokin'! Hahahaha.

A couple of the guides there hit on me (they have bad taste) but I didn't mind, especially when Gede was doing it too :D

Oh look at me all giddy like a schoolgirl

On another note, on the morning of Friday 26 June, I went to my parents' hotel room and my mum told me that Michael Jackson passed away. I was so shocked. He was one of my heroes growing up :( RIP MJ. At least he's now free from all the stress and scandals and paparazzi.

so messed up

2009-06-23T08:36:00.000-07:00

OK my sleeping pattern is offcially fucked up.

Last night I didn't sleep.

Then today while in my aunt's car I dozed off for about 30 minutes on the way to Arab Street. Felt somewhat recharged. Had fun choosing the cloth for my baju raya. Though I was a bit out of it.

Went home. I can't really remember what time I took a nap. I think it was about 6.30pm. I was soooo tired and full from the nasi ayam penyet from makanshiok (FAVOURITE!!!) and reminded myself that I would take the clothes down from the bamboo poles after my nap. Sorry ibu. I took a nap (a rarity). Then when I woke up it was total disorientation. I thought it was already the next day. For some reason I panicked.

I remember some years back I was dog tired after a long day at school and I hit went straight to bed as soon as I got home. When I woke up it was about 6.30pm. The sky was darkening slightly and it looked like the wrong side of 6.30AM. I panicked and ran out of the room shouting "ALAMAK IBU TENGOK LA KNAPE TAK KEJOTKAN HIDAYAH SEKARANG HIDAYAH DAH LAMBAT NI" And then before my mom could correct me I realized it was just the evening and not early morning. It was all rather weird.
Back to my sleeping pattern. When I woke up just now it was about 8.30+++ as fighting spiders was on. I dozed in an out throughout the show (I wasn't watching it though). And when I woke up I felt energized and was up for a game of L4D.

Now I'm worried I won't be getting any sleep tonight because tomorrow's gonna be a busy day for me(packing, collecting cert, movie). Maybe I'll listen to some Sigur Ros before I turn in.

fig and olive

2009-06-22T10:39:00.000-07:00

But I HATE olives.

Met my favourite girls at Bodycity. I mean Vivocity. You see, I learnt in a Biology class that "vivo" means "body". Hence the term ex vivo, meaning out of body. Introduced shallybelly to a whole new universe that is the vivocity wing with Page One, Earle Swensens and all that ("Is Swensen's Scandinavian?" Siti asked, a couple of weeks ago. No, it isn't). Ate at fig and olive. Food was good. Company was great. Gossip was equally good (as always. Gossip never gets old).

Chose one of the few dishes that didn't have olives in it. I didn't want to pick the olives out of the food. How uncivilised. Nicked some of dm's spaghetti. Yum. Shallybelly exhibited the same reaction as leeling did when we told her The News (courtesy of dm). I swore I heard a clang when shallybelly's jaw dropped. Walked around, got lost, and eventually found our way to Coffee Bean. Had an interesting conversation along the way. Didn't get to the juiciest details as hq was on the phone...talking about bellydancing. They ran out of Caramel Ice Blended (like fig and olive ran out of something...I forget what. We have bad timing) so I got Hazelnut instead. Tasted the same as Caramel. We continued Juicy Gossip after buying our drinks. Very enriching.

Sadly we had to part. Aaah the confines of time.

But look! While in Page One, we were hit by a sudden tide of inspiration (Chris Pine's gorgeous mug on the over of a magazine), and spontaneously wrote a song which goes as such:

"I pine for Chris Pine
He sure is fine
Hands off girls
For he is mine
So stop quit bitchin
And get in line"
Music and lyrics by Nader/Amirhamzsa

I tweaked it a little. It's a work in progress. Sadly we were too late to get it on the Star Trek soundtrack. Oh well.

P.S. I'm itching to play l4d. But my brother is sleeping in the room with the Xbox (his room). Urgh. Who the hell sleeps at 2:34 am? Don't think I'll sleep tonight, since I have be up early tomorrow anyway. When I sleep, it'll be easier to move a log. Hence I would be convenently left out of the outing. Hmppf. So no sleep tonight.

OMG I WANT

2009-06-22T09:37:00.000-07:00

IT'S A LIVE FURBY!!!!!!

CILFFHANGER

2009-06-18T00:19:00.000-07:00

I HATE CLIFFHANGERS!!!!!!

I'm reading Fushigi Yuugi Genbu Kaiden and it's the mother of all cliffhangers at the end of chapter 32! And it's not like I have only a month to wait for the next chapter...

I HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL MID-FUCKING-2010! Because the manga is on hiatus. I'll go insane!

Uruki's all like "I'll make you my bride tonight"

And Takiko's all like :O

And then below it's "End of Chapter 32"

And I'm all like WHAT THE FUCKING FUCKITY FUCK WATASE YUU!

NOOOOOOO I HAVE TO WAIT A WHOLE YEARRRRRR

Nah but I know what's going to happen. Uruki's not gonna do it. Because Takiko has to remain a virgin for her to summon the weirdo turtle god. Watase Yuu is getting predictable. Or maybe I'm just reading too much of her (fabulous) work.

On another note, my favourite shichiseishi is now Tomite. Sorry Uruki. Sorry Tasuki. Uruki was an early favourite but he got a bit too Tamahome-ish for me...you know, all that "I'll protect you with my life and you should leave my sight ever again"...it's all a bit too sappy for me.

Tomite...the pervert. He's funny.

SHIT

2009-06-15T09:59:00.000-07:00

Soooo pissed.

So I wanna read this book, yeah, it's Necropolis by Anthony Horowitz, yeah, so I look it up in the library catalogue (it's in my favourites), and find that it's available in Woodlands library, yeah, and I look for it on the shelves and it's not there.

FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. BPIUG*)&^&**G%^&FGJNJKFDRE

I made the trip from the western part of western Singapore all the way to Woodlands (the freaking north) just to find that freaking book. Bloody hell. So I made an enquiry at the "Children's Advisory Corner" or whatever that counter was called to ask about the book. The librarian searched for the book in that room will the newly returned books, on the shelves and on the display shelves. Nada. Nil. Zilch. Nothing. Null. She said someone's probably browsing through it" I thanked her, apologized for making her get up from her work and whatever but inside I was fuming (mind you, my apologies and thanks were genuine). And you know what people? That was my 2nd try. At 7pm. I first checked at 3pm. So people, if you're done browsing through a book, please put it back at its right shelf. For the love of God. Please. If you don't someone who made a treacherous journey from a faraway place just to get the book will be very very very upset.

I've been waiting to borrow this book for 8 months now. EIGHT. EIGHT. Never mind. One day, one day, I'll get my hands on it. One day.

Hahahaha see the trivial matters I can get worked up about? Aaaah how the passion of Anthony Horowitz books burns brightly in my heart.

On another note, I am thankful that my bro knows how to use algebra in problem sums...now to tackle those shitty ones that even I have trouble with (it's very hard now!!! I pity the younger generation...:( )....God give me strength.

IT'S OFFICIAL.

2009-06-15T08:37:00.001-07:00

I'm getting a cat when I get my own house! Preferably a blue cat. Blue cats are awesome.

SOOOOO CUTE

*hiten*mitsurugi*ryuu*

bunch of random stuff

Rollercoaster

The day before

2012

stuff that has been going on

random(?) memory

king's cross

yeah whatever

goals for the near future

sadness

interesting

puke

it sucks that

string snap

a fork in the road and i chose the wrong route?

copied from other blog.

guitar noobdom

you fucking jerk.

My favourite lyrics.

in my world, the line between wants and needs is blurred.

my sort of t-shirts

today sucked ass.

T-3

hey there.

THE EXAMS ARE COMING! THE EXAMS ARE COMING!

seriously?

this is why i love the muse boards sooo much

bloody test

nooooo

'cari jodoh' is the theme song of my life

finally...

stupid math mid-term. i didn't sign up for this! really.

it's gonna catch up to me one day

of diving. recreational and commercial

yeeaaaahhh

Ze Tioman Dive Trip

just a taste of what's to come

vodkabilly

are you STILL reading my blog?

looonng day tomorrow.

forensic medicine...

aiyoooooo

What...

bulan ramadhan...

bulan ramadhan...

major...

school so far

please be nice to me.

aiayayaaiaia

spare me

unofficial first day

pening

dog-tired...

worthless post

Superman Is Dead - Bukan Pahlawan

phew

flu

anticipation

The long overdue Bali entry. Read if you dare.

sial betul ah

oooooh

hooray

shit

OOOOOO THANK GOD

urgh.

Another reason why I love Stockholm

memories

cheebye

2 posts in a day. a rarity

oh hurry up, december

change in taste. no...maybe an expansion (oooh!)

oh boohooo sob

Back from Bali

so messed up

fig and olive

OMG I WANT

CILFFHANGER

SHIT

IT'S OFFICIAL.

hitenmitsurugiryuu